The Aching
by advienne
Summary: Rin is seeing Sesshoumaru in a new light, Sesshoumaru believes that Rin has chosen a mate. Will Sesshoumaru learn the truth or will Rin leave Sesshoumaru forever? The End?
1. Out of Character

This story has been edited; if you wish to go read the story in it's true form go to adultfanfiction.net.  
  
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It had been 13 years since Rin had met the Lord of the Western Lands and now she was a month shy of being 16. She was growing up into a young beautiful lady and not only did she look like one, but she felt like one as well.  
  
In addition, with these new feelings towards her new self, Rin was beginning to seeing Sesshoumaru in a new light.  
  
For a few months now, she had been getting very aroused when he would be near her, but she did not know if it body needs or if she was starting to have feelings towards the stern youkai.  
  
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One morning, Rin was walking out of her bedroom to go down to breakfast and Sesshoumaru walked passed. He smelled of vanilla and fresh, he had just taken a bath. Rin inhaled his smell as he greeted her.  
  
"Good Morning Rin, did you sleep well?"  
  
Rin did not answer him quickly; she being too dazed by his smell to answer such a simple question.  
  
"Rin is something wrong this morning?"  
  
"Oh no I am fine, and yourself?" she looked down.  
  
"Fine, shall we?" he motioned for her to go ahead of him.  
  
A few hours later Rin was in her room reading. As she read, Rin was starting to become tired and decided to take a nap.  
  
"Oh, Sesshoumaru"  
  
"SESSHOUMARU"  
  
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In the study, Sesshoumaru heard Rin scream his name. [Rin] he thought as he ran to her bedroom. He whipped open the door only thinking the worst had happen to his dear Rin. The demon lord saw the fragile girl lying on her bed sleeping peacefully.  
  
[That is odd she was just yelling.] Sesshoumaru walked over to Rin, heard her breathing become even, and smelled her sweet smell, although now it had a spicy musk to it.  
  
[She could not have been dreaming a dream like 'that'? right?] As Sesshoumaru thought about it more he remember that Rin was about to be  
  
16. (A/N meaning that her body has and will be able to bare children now.)  
  
He sat on the bed next to her trying to wake her from her obviously very exotic dream.  
  
"Rin. Rin, it is time for you to wake up." he whispered into her delicate ear.  
  
At this, she rolled over and hugged her pillow, "Mmmm.. Sesshoumaru."  
  
The youkia grinned inward at her respond to him.  
  
"Rin," he put more forces into his profound voice.  
  
The young girl woke to find the person who was just ravishing her (in the dream.) Startled she grabbed the covers and backed away from him.  
  
"What are you doing in here?"  
  
"You were screaming my name and I came to see what the matter was. Are you alright?"  
  
"Never better." she looked away, as she felt her blood rise to her cheeks.  
  
Sesshoumaru looked at her strangely, "Good, then would you like to join me for dinner?"  
  
"Of course, I would enjoy that. Just let me freshen up and then I will meet you down stairs."  
  
Sesshoumaru left Rin to her business, [Oh great what if he heard me scream his name as he..] just the thought of him doing what he did in the dream made her melt.  
  
[I cannot believe I had that dream, I mean he would never think of me that way, would he. Ugh. stop thinking like that he is Sesshoumaru nothing else.]  
  
Rin took a bath then went down stairs to the dinning room where she found the demon lord already sitting.  
  
Sesshoumaru gazed at her intensely after hearing what he thought was Rin having a dirty dream about him, although he did not know for sure.  
  
Rin sat across the table from him feeling too awkward sitting too close to him after that.  
  
They sat in silence as they ate their meal. After for what seem everlastingly, Sesshoumaru excused him-self from the table.  
  
"I am sorry, but it is getting very late and I have things to do in the morning so." he stood up and walked over to Rin to bid his farewell.  
  
" Oh of course, Good night Sesshoumaru." she stood up about to follow  
  
him out of the room to go to her own, when Sesshoumaru cupped her face and kissed her on her forehead.  
  
"Good night Rin," he walked out of the room down the hall to his bedroom.  
  
Shocked, Rin just stood there not understanding what had just taken place.  
  
A/N: If you liked what you read then review please and I will write more. Thx for reading! Please Review. ^-^ 


	2. Stay With Me Tonight

The next day, Rin went out for a walk around in the yard. As she took in the scenery, she analyzed what happened last night.  
  
[Was Sesshoumaru just being fatherly to me or was there something else behind that kiss. No, he would never mean it that way. Gosh, it was just a kiss on the forehead anyway. I mean he would never see me that way because I am just a pathetic human. A youkai like that would never fall for something like me.]  
  
Still lost in her thoughts, she took no notice to that, that youkai was right behind her.  
  
"Rin, what are you doing out here?"  
  
Poor Rin scared half to death jumped nearly 10 feet in the air. "Lord Sesshoumaru, why did you scare me like that? I nearly died."  
  
"Sorry, I did not think that being out side in the castle walls would make you so paranoid." he grinned sarcastically.  
  
"Well I just thought it was another youkai and you were not around. so I get scared when I heard things or someone walks up behind me." realizing that being scared in the castle walls did sound ridiculous, she smiled.  
  
Sesshoumaru shook his head at the dumbfounded girl. "So what were you thinking about that would make to forget about what was happening around you?"  
  
"Nothing important, just thoughts." feeling the heat rise to her cheeks again she began to walk away from him.  
  
The demon lord followed her, "Rin, I was wondering if."  
  
"Yes" she was so nervous about what he was going to say, she cut him off.  
  
"You are going to be 16 soon right?"  
  
"Next month." she sat down disappointed.  
  
Sesshoumaru sat across from her staring at her raven locks tossed around in the wind. Her face looked so sad, which he hated seeing. Sesshoumaru took Rin around the waist and placed her in his lap, moving the hair away from her face.  
  
Rin turned her face away from him as her blush went out of control. Plus being so happy from his actions Rin could not stop smiling. She heard him take a deep breath by her head. [Did he smell my hair?]  
  
She faced him and put her forehead on his chest, still hiding her crimson face. [How can I not love him. What am I saying he is just being a dog and smelling me nothing to get excited about, but I love it.]  
  
Sesshoumaru brought her closer to him.  
  
[Why is he doing this?]  
  
He placed his claw under her chin tilting her head towards his, Rin breathed in deep. The demon lord brought his handsome face closer to the young girl.  
  
"My Lord? Sir? You are needed." spoke a shrill voice.  
  
Sesshoumaru shot up making Rin fall to the ground.  
  
"How many times do I have to tell you not to disturb me."  
  
"Bu- but sir it is important that you come. The other Lords are here to speak with you."  
  
Not even saying goodbye to Rin, Sesshoumaru walked up towards the castle with the bumbling idiot, Jaken.  
  
Rin sat there where Sesshoumaru had dropped her, [What was that? One minute he was holding me as if we had confessed our deepest desires and then throws me to the ground. Also, was he going to kiss me? I mean he brought he face so close and..] her thoughts began to become like her dream.  
  
Soon the moon was being to replace where the sun had been. Seeing this Rin walked in the direction of the castle. [Great now Sesshoumaru is going to be mad that I did not come in before dark.. I don't care he threw me to the ground, the jerk.]  
  
When she walked, pass his study she noticed that he was not there. Rin went to her room before being seen by someone.  
  
She opened the door to her room and saw a tall slivery figure standing by her window. [Oh no, please don't let him yell.]  
  
She slinked over to her closet trying not to make a lot of noise. "Forgive me, I did not mean to drop you to the ground when I left this afternoon."  
  
[Huh? is he not mad at me?]  
  
"It is. it's umm." how could she respond to him. He never acted with remorse.  
  
"Well Goodnight." he let him-self out of her room.  
  
[What is going on? Why is acting to bizarre? Something that the other Lords said must have hit him hard, but he has been acting like this for two days. I need a bath.] Rin walked to the hot spring to clear her mind of everything although all she could think about was him.  
  
The young girl slid into the sweltering water, which gave her goose bumps. She laid her head back and closed her eyes.  
  
"Rin wake up."  
  
"Huh?" she felt hands pick her up out of the now lukewarm water.  
  
"You fell asleep while you were bathing." Sesshoumaru wrapped the towel around her weak body. However being a male, he did take a few glances at her.  
  
He brought her to her room where he laid her in the bed.  
  
"I want you to sleep now."  
  
Rin, exhausted turned over and did what he asked.  
  
Hours later Rin awoke to find her-self in her bed lacking of clothing. She put on a sliver kimono and walked out to go find her rescuer.  
  
Rin heard something coming from his study, she tipped toed in to find him sitting in a large leather chair with his face in his hands.  
  
Boldly, Rin knelt in front of him, "I am sorry that I fell asleep in the bath. I did not mean to scare you."  
  
Sesshoumaru sighed at her remark taking his strong hands away from his face and patting her on her head.  
  
"Rin, you did scare me by doing that. How could I live with out you?"  
  
Surprised by his response she just shrugged.  
  
"Anyways, what are you doing out of bed? I thought I told you to sleep."  
  
"I wanted to tell you that I was sorry." she did not want to tell him the truth that she was just lonely.  
  
"I forgive you."  
  
"Sesshoumaru, will I would you like to sleep in my bed tonight? I mean it does get so dark in there and you are just sitting in here."  
  
"Thank you." He took her hand helping her up off the ground and they walked to her bedroom.  
  
They laid down in the massive bed; Rin being so nervous laid close to the edge. [Why did I ask him to stay here? He must think I am such a child.]  
  
Sesshoumaru seeing her so far away took her by the waist and pulled her to the center of the bed where he was.  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
She shook her up and down.  
  
"You laid so far away I thought you going to fall off."  
  
"Sorry."  
  
"Do not be sorry. Now I can make sure you will not fall."  
  
Rin just smiled as he tightened his grip, [I love him, I love him, I love him.]  
  
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Rin felt the warmth of the sun on her face, she stretched out then went to grab her pillow, but instead she grabbed the muscular body below her.  
  
"What the?" she had forgotten that she asked Sesshoumaru to sleep with her last night. He was still asleep at least she thought he was.  
  
[Oh great, how am I to get off him?] She slid off him and rolled towards her side of the bed.  
  
"Sesshoumaru are you wake?" she nudged his cheek with her slider fingers.  
  
"It's morning now, Sesshoumaru?"*sigh* [God he is beautiful.] Rin started to get off the bed when a hand snatched her.  
  
"Good morning, Rin"  
  
"Hello" she said weakly.  
  
"Are you rested?"  
  
"Very. Thank you."  
  
"Good." still holding her, Sesshoumaru went back to sleep.  
  
"My Lord, may I leave?"  
  
"No you need more sleep."  
  
"But I told you that I was rested and."  
  
Nothing she said could have changed his mind if he wanted to hold her he could.  
  
Unlike the demon lord, Rin could not sleep, [I do not mind that he holds me, but I do not understand why. I mean, one minute he acts as if he likes me and then ugh I do not know. I wish I could just ask him.]  
  
"Sesshoumaru?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Ummm. why." she couldn't, "Do you ever want to get married?" [Why in the seven hells did I ask him that? Stupid, Stupid, Stupid.]  
  
"Married?"  
  
"Yeah my mother and father got married very young and you are not even dating someone."  
  
"Umm I will not marry someone, Rin, I will mate with someone and I have not found her yet."  
  
"Oh well I just wondering because I remember my mother showing me her wedding kimono and I thought it was gorgeous." all she could do was ramble.  
  
"Really, what did it look like?" he sounded interested.  
  
"Well, it was white with embroidered flowers, they were cherry blossoms, white and sliver beads traced everything. It was amazing and ever since I saw it I want to be married in it." her voice started to sink as the thought of mother flooded her mind.  
  
Sesshoumaru held Rin closer trying to bring her comfort. There was nothing he could say to make her feel better, but he thought by hugging her and holding her would help.  
  
"Rin are you going to be okay?"  
  
"Yes, I want to go get dressed, please."  
  
He let her go and Rin went to her closet and got dressed, then left her room to go met Sesshoumaru in the dinning room for breakfast.  
  
After a delicious meal and another awkward silence with Sesshoumaru, Rin headed back to her room.  
  
She opened the door, "Who are you?"  
  
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A/N: Thank you for all that have read so far! REVIEW!!! ^.^ 


	3. Wanting and Waiting

*Warning some suggestive sexual content, If you are not +17 then do not read.*  
  
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"Excuse me, but who are you and what are you doing in my room?"  
  
"Oh sorry I am Kay; I am your servant and will do whatever you ask of me, My Lady."  
  
Rin walked over and shook the female youkai hand, "Oh well you my call  
  
"Umm Rin, I was wondering what would you like me to do for you first."  
  
"I do not know I have never had a servant before." Rin giggled realizing that this was an odd situation and wonder who go her into to it.  
  
"Kay, is it? I was wondering who asked you to look after me."  
  
"I was asked by the demon lord, Sesshoumaru."  
  
Rin was shocked that he had done this for her, "Will you excuse me for a minute I have something important to do. I will be right back."  
  
"Of course Rin."  
  
Rin ran down the hallway looking frantically for him. *BAM* Rin ran straight into him.  
  
"Going somewhere?"  
  
"Yes in a matter of fact I was looking for you."  
  
"And why is that?"  
  
"Why did you get me a servant?"  
  
"I thought you would like one for a companionship. Do not want one I could always."  
  
"No, it is fine I just did not understand why you did, but thank you, I'm glad you did."  
  
"Good, well now that is settled I something important to attend to." Sesshoumaru left Rin to deal with her new 'friend'. She walked back into her room where the youkai was sitting in a chair.  
  
"So, Kay would you like to see the garden?" Rin was not going to let her clean all day that is just too cruel and besides Kay was to be her companion.  
  
They walked out to the lush garden, "This garden is so beautiful."  
  
"That is why I love spending all my time here."  
  
"Well I can see why."  
  
As Kay walked around the stunning garden, Rin noticed that Sesshoumaru was in his study working. [I wish I could tell him that I love him. Would it be that bad?]  
  
"Rin are you okay?"  
  
"Wh- what oh yes I'm fine."  
  
"So is that Lord Sesshoumaru's study up there."  
  
"Yes, why?"  
  
"Because you were staring so hard that I thought you going to stare a hole in it."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"You like him don't you?" she gave Rin a comforting smile.  
  
The young girl laughed showing that she did have feelings for the demon lord. "I do like him, but it is just an infatuation. He would never, you know like me back." Rin gave a sigh at the thought.  
  
"Well I do not know you are very pretty and you are close to him, maybe he does return your feelings. You should never give up hope."  
  
"Thank you." Rin walked over to her servant and they walked around the castle for the rest of the afternoon.  
  
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Later that night Rin could not sleep, [Does he like me? Sesshoumaru acts as if he does, I think. Ugh .men are frustrating. Sesshoumaru stay with me last night, doesn't that mean something. I wish he could just tell me how he feels with out these little games.] Rin walked into his study to get a book that she had been reading. Feeling safe enough she sat in his chair and began to read.  
  
Hours later Rin heard the door squeak, "What do you think you are doing in here?" there were razor sharp claws around her throat.  
  
Rin immediately closed her eyes, "I am sorry I did not think you would be upset if I sat here."  
  
"Rin!" He loosened his grip and let her go.  
  
She slid off the chair and touched her throat. Her hand was moist she looked down; sprinkles of blood stained her hands.  
  
"Forgive me I thought you were someone else. Rin I would never harm you. Rin look at me."  
  
She tried to hold back the tears, but the terror that she felt when he attacked her did not help. The unwanted tears started to flow; she backed away from him.  
  
Seeing Rin tears, he walked over to the young girl slowly and took her in his arms. Rin did not protest his warm body was very welcoming that she never wanted to leave. Sesshoumaru began to rub her back as he did in the garden. Rin looked up to see his handsome face she met his golden eyes.  
  
"Sesshou." His soft lips captured Rin's enabling not to finish her sentence.  
  
Sesshoumaru made the kiss deeper, which made Rin moaned in his mouth, making him drive her slider body closer to his.  
  
Rin's arousal went out of control junction between her legs were as damp as ever. Sesshoumaru scented this and stopped the kiss, because he was afraid of him-self for what he would do to her and would like.  
  
"Rin, I am sorry I did not mean to take advantage of you like that."  
  
In shock from not only the kiss, but also his actions Rin did not respond to his apologue.  
  
Sesshoumaru left her in his study and went to bed.  
  
[He kissed me! I cannot believe he just did that and why did he apologize to me? I did not mind it at all. (He He) What did he mean take advantage of me? Did he just do that because, he wanted to kiss someone or did he do that because he likes me?] Rin went back to her room still confused and tried to sleep; she did however, it was not a good night.  
  
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In the morning, Kay woke Rin up from her restless night, "Bad night Rin?"  
  
"Huh? Oh yes it was I think that it was the more weird rather than bad."  
  
"How do you mean?"  
  
"Well. I cannot believe that I am really going to tell someone this, but Sesshoumaru kissed me last night and then apologized for doing it."  
  
"Umm that does sound like an odd thing to do to someone after you kiss them."  
  
"It was; I do not understand him at all. For the last few days, he has been acting this way and I don't get it. I don't get it."  
  
"Well I think that he does care for you in that way but, maybe he does not know if you are ready for that."  
  
"Perhaps you are right. I mean he did kiss me, which means he has to have some feelings towards me. You always know what to say to make me see clearly. What would I do with out you?"  
  
"Oh well thank you, Rin, I like being here for you." she smiled at the young girl as she left her alone in her room.  
  
[Dumb girl, does she really think that a youkai like Sesshoumaru will ever fall for her. Humans really must be brainless.]  
  
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That night, Rin stayed away from Sesshoumaru. She tried as best as she could, but it was hopeless.  
  
"Rin, I would like to talk to you."  
  
"What about?" this was going to be awkward, the young girl thought to her- self.  
  
"Well I cannot discuss it at this pierce moment, but will you meet me tomorrow in the garden?"  
  
[Oh lord he is going to ask me to be his mate. I can only hope.]  
  
"Of course I will. When would you like me to meet you?"  
  
Sesshoumaru looked at with such joy Rin had ever thought could exist, "After lunch when I am done with all my work."  
  
"Wonderful, till then." Rin walked away smiling from ear to ear.  
  
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A/N: Sorry for the delay and for such a short chapter. I hope that you all liked it. Tell me what you think! Review Review Review!! ^-^ 


	4. Telling the Truth

Warning there is hard lime/lemon in this story if you are not of age please leave*  
  
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Sesshoumaru could not handle it anymore. He pushed open the bedroom door finding the young girl asleep. Rays of light danced across her pale face andmagnifying her swollen lips. He walked over to her and pulled off the covers, revealing her exquisite body.  
  
She woke up to see the beautiful youkai leaning over her. Rin smiled then took Sesshoumaru's hand a placed on her well-formed breast, arching her back.  
  
He began to place trough kisses over her collarbone and neck. Sesshoumaru had to take her now for his member was pulsating so badly that he thought he would go mad. He ripped off her nightgown and his clothing as well.  
  
"Oh Sesshoumaru" Rin gasped she could hardly breath.  
  
The demon lord watched her wriggle under his powerfully built body.  
  
"I . I love you, Sesshoumaru.  
  
Sesshoumaru shot up in bed pouring sweat.  
  
"It was only a dream, only a dream." Sesshoumaru lay in bed thinking about his dream. [I have to tell her or I will go crazy.]  
  
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Rin went down stairs for breakfast, when she noticed that the demon lord was not in the dinning room she deicide to go to the kitchen. She pushed open the wooden door no one was to be found. Then Rin heard crying in the corner, she followed the sound. The young girl found who was making the noise.  
  
"Are you alright?"  
  
The young male youkai looked at Rin and did not answer.  
  
"Did something happen to you? Are you lost?"  
  
"No, my lady I am the kitchen boy here."  
  
"What is bothering you? Something must have happened to you." Rin knelt by the boy trying to make him tell her what was wrong.  
  
"Actually I need your help with something. I need a girl's thoughts about something." he looked at her with hopeful eyes.  
  
"I would be glad to help you what is it."  
  
They walked out of the kitchen so that no one could hear their conversation. In garden, the young girl and boy sat and talked of his problem.  
  
"See I am in love with this girl from a village not to far from here, but I do not think that she could ever love a youkai like me."  
  
Understanding the situation from the girl's point of view knew what to ask,  
  
"Has she acted as if she does not have feelings for you?"  
  
"No she always greets me every time I go to the village. She does care for me I think, but as a friend. However I want more."  
  
"Well you should tell her that you like her. I bet she has been waiting for you to tell her. Girls hate waiting for the guy they like to tell them so."  
  
"Thank you so much lady Rin. I will go there right now." he threw his arms around Rin and gave her a kiss on the cheek showing his gratitude.  
  
Rin saw the lovesick boy run off in the direction of the village. She sat on the bench for the rest of the day waiting for Sesshoumaru hopefully to tell her his passion for her.  
  
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Sesshoumaru finished his work, but waited for a while before meeting Rin in the garden. He walked over to his window to see if she was there. The demon lord saw her sitting with a young youkai making his blood boil. He watched the boy hug and kiss her and then leave, Sesshoumaru even saw when Rin blushed after the kiss.  
  
*Knock Knock*  
  
"Sir? I have the white with embroidered flowers, cherry blossoms, white and sliver beaded kimono you ask be made for Rin."  
  
"Burn it," he did not turn away from the window.  
  
"Sir?"  
  
"Did you not hear me? Now get out of here."  
  
Jaken knew he would live to regret this, "Why do you want it burned Sir?"  
  
"Do you like living Jaken?"  
  
"Yes Sir." he answered with a questioning tone.  
  
"Then I suggest that you leave my chambers at once."  
  
The toad left the demon lord alone with his thoughts. [I should have known that she would fall for another. I should have never thought other wise. I hoped that it would not come to this, but I know what I have to do for her; especially now that she has chosen a mate.]  
  
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Rin sat on the same bench all afternoon and long into the evening. [I do not understand he said that he would meet me here and he never lies. Maybe he just forgot. I should go find him.]  
  
She got off the bench and headed for the castle. As she walked inside of the castle, she noticed Kay walking in a hurry.  
  
Rin took no notice of where she was going and just kept on with her search for Sesshoumaru.  
  
The young girl spent 20 minutes trying to find him. Rin gave up and went to her room to change for dinner.  
  
She walked down to the dinning room and like that morning Sesshoumaru was not there. Rin did not wait for him to come and eat with her because she had skipped lunch waiting for him.  
  
A half an hour he decided to grace Rin with his presences. With out even looking at her or saying a word he sat down.  
  
"Sesshoumaru, where were you I waited for you all day?"  
  
He sat there with a cold look.  
  
"I thought you said you had something to tell me. Did you not?"  
  
Still nothing from the demon lord.  
  
Rin decided that it was probably best that she did not question him any more. She finished her meal and then went to her room.  
  
She slammed the door behind her, "Why do I even bother with him?" she yelled out.  
  
Rin fell on to her bed, [I hate him. He probably just kissed me to relive his sexual stress. I do not understand why. If he does not like me then why do this to me?] Feeling betrayed Rin started to cry.  
  
Hours later when Rin calm down she decided that perhaps it was time she told him, [I mean what he would do to me. It is not as if he could hurt even more.]  
  
She was going to do it she could not hold back any more. Courageously she walked to Sesshoumaru's bedroom. Rin pushed open the heavy wooden door.  
  
"Oh Sesshoumaru you are too wonderful." Kay was straddling Sesshoumaru as he sat in a leather chair.  
  
Rin could not run away from the site. All the hate she felt for him before hit her body. "I am sorry I thought that you would be alone. Forgive me."  
  
"Rin!" Sesshoumaru pushed the whore off him and ran after Rin.  
  
The crushed girl ran as fast as she could, letting the swollen tears pour from her brown eyes. Rin could hear him getting closer. She tried to get to her room, but it was useless. Sesshoumaru grabbed her and pinned her to the wall thinking that maybe then she would let him speak.  
  
"I should have known that you pick her. I thought she was to be my friend, but I guess you had other plans for her." Rin did not mean to say 'picked her' but at this time, she did not care. He did not love her or want her.  
  
"Listen to me I did not want for you to see that."  
  
"You don't have to explain your-self to me. I do not care Sesshoumaru." She cared and because she did, it hurt even worst.  
  
"Fine," he let her go, though he wanted her to know that he did not want Kay she was just there.  
  
Rin slid out of his grip and walked into her room before her crying became screams. That night she lay in bed just crying non-stop, all night.  
  
Sesshoumaru was in his study think about the look on Rin's face when she caught them in that position, even though they did have there clothes on he felt horrible. [I have ruined my only chance with Rin. She will never have me now. Why should I even care she has already found a mate. In addition, to that she thinks that Kay and I are together. I never wanted this to happen.]  
  
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A/N: Sorry for the short chapter. I did not know what to write really, but I hope that you all liked it ^-^ and as always please REVIEW!! Thx 


	5. Misunderstanding

Sesshoumaru awoke very early the next morning trying figure out how he was to tell Rin his decision. [I have to do this for her. This the only way she will be happy, after what has happened. Why did I have let Kay into my room? Why didn't Rin tell me she had chosen a mate? I could have made her happy.]  
  
Sesshoumaru heard her walking down the hall; he called for Rin to come into his study to talk about something he had to tell her.  
  
Rin opened the door to see him seated at his desk with his interlaced fingers together in front of his mouth. She hated it when he gave that look, it always made her give into anything he asked of her and right now, she hated him.  
  
"Rin, please sit down I have something of greatly important to tell you."  
  
She sat across from him hopping that the next words out of his mouth would be that he did not love Kay and that he wanted her. That he loved her.  
  
"Rin, how would you like to have a mother?"  
  
"What? A mother?"  
  
"Yes, I have decided to take on a mate. She is very mature figure for you and she will be able to help you in your time of need." He could not even look at her.  
  
"I don't want a mother. I don't need a mother." her voice was cold.  
  
"Rin."  
  
"I never asked for a mother. If I had wanted a mother, I would have asked for one." She got up from the large chair and headed towards the door.  
  
"Rin! Get back here I was not done talking to you!"  
  
"I don't care. If you think for one second that I will let some stranger tell me what to do then you are mistaken."  
  
"You will do what I ask of you. Kay will be your mother and I do not want to hear what you have to say on the matter. Are we clear on that?"  
  
"Kay? She is to be my mother! I will never let that disgusting pig be my mother or tell me what to do." Rin stormed out of his study, slamming the door behind her. Rin went to her bedroom; the young girl sank to the floor in front of her door. She was crying so hard that she was shaking. [I hate Kay and Sesshoumaru, how could he do this to me. Now I know why he did not choose me for his mate. He is in love with Kay. I should have never let my- self fall for a youkai.]  
  
Sesshoumaru was still in his study think of what she had just said to him. [I never wanted this to happen. The only thing I ever wanted was Rin and that young youkai took her. I would slaughter him if was not for Rin, if she did not love him. I have lost the only thing I ever loved.]  
  
Sesshoumaru did not understand why she would acted like that it was as if she wanted him to say something else, but what? Furthermore, Rin never yelled or talked back to him. This puzzled Sesshoumaru greatly.  
  
He needed to go clear his mind, so Sesshoumaru went a walk around the castle. As he tried to analyze what Rin said to him, Sesshoumaru noticed a boy running down the hall with a young girl. It was Rin's "mate" he was with another girl.  
  
Seeing this Sesshoumaru went after the little "betrayer" (A/N: the boy is with the girl he loves from the village and Sesshoumaru thinks that he is cheating on Rin. Sorry to slow you down, keep reading.)  
  
The demon lord grabbed the youkai by the throat, his clawing were piercing the boy's skin.  
  
"How dare you deceive Rin!" Sesshoumaru's eyes went red with anger.  
  
"Rin? I am not deceiving Rin" the young youkai trembled in the air.  
  
"Who is that girl?"  
  
"She is my mate."  
  
Confused, Sesshoumaru slow put the boy down.  
  
"Sesshoumaru what are you doing?" Rin grabbed his arm trying to loosen his grip on the poor boy.  
  
"I am sorry he did not mean to hurt you." she tried to bring comfort to the young youkai.  
  
The two lovers quickly walked away.  
  
Sesshoumaru turned to Rin, but she was walking away from him before he could say a word. Then she heard Kay walking up him.  
  
"Sesshoumaru are you okay?"  
  
Rin headed back to her room. She could not stand being around him yet alone look at him. [I never want to see him again. I cannot take the pain; especially when I see her around him.]  
  
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Rin creped out of her bedroom, down the hall pass Sesshoumaru's room, down the stairs, then out the doors. She walked out pass the borders, it was still night.  
  
As dawn broke, it began to rain. [Damn it, I should have know that this would happen.] Rin kept walking until she heard someone breathing deeply behind her.  
  
"What are you doing out here?!" yelled the profound voice.  
  
Rin turned around seeing a soaking Sesshoumaru. Apart of her wanted to laugh at him, but she was still angry with him.  
  
"Answer me!"  
  
She could not bring her-self to answer him; all she wanted to do was cry.  
  
"Well.fine you are coming back with me." He grabbed her hand.  
  
Rin pulled away, he then took her by the waist and slung her over his shoulder. Sesshoumaru walked up the castle relieved that he found her. He pushed open the door to the castle still holding on to Rin.  
  
"Will you let me go now?" Rin started to wiggle off him.  
  
Sesshoumaru placed her on the ground however left his hands on her hips.  
  
"Don't touch me." she pushed him away.  
  
"Rin what were you doing out there?"  
  
"I can't stand being around you! You are. Why Kay?"  
  
"What about Kay? I thought that you always wanted a mother." his voice was cold and dark hurt by Rin's words.  
  
"Never mind." she started to walk away from him.  
  
He grabbed her wrist making sure that she could not get away from him.  
  
"Rin tell me!"  
  
"Why didn't you come that day you said that you wanted to see me? Was it because of her? Did you want to tell me then that you loved her instead of." hot tears started to fall from her eyes.  
  
"I did not come because I saw you with your mate."  
  
"What? My mate, he is not my mate. Is that why you attacked him today?"  
  
"I thought he was cheating on you. No one is allowed to hurt you, Rin." he looked her straight in the eyes.  
  
"He asked me to help him to ask that girl is was with to be his mate, because he loves her." her heart began to ach knowing that she could never have that feeling with Sesshoumaru.  
  
Rin turned and walked away from the demon lord's grasp. Sesshoumaru let her go.  
  
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A/N: I don't think that a lot of people are enjoying this story so even though I *do* know what else to write for this story. I don't know if I should continue with it. So Review if you want me to keep writing. Thx for those who have reviewed so far. ^-^ 


	6. Dear Rin

The next day, Sesshoumaru stayed in his study, not wanting to be bothered. Expect Kay did not think that meant for her to stay out as well.  
  
Kay flung open the door, "Good morning Sesshoumaru or should I say Good afternoon."  
  
Sesshoumaru gave her a cold stare.  
  
"You have been in here all day and I wanted to ask you a question."  
  
She looked at him expecting him to answer her all lovely dovey, Sesshoumaru thought other wise.  
  
"I want you out of here and I don't want to see you in this castle ever again. You hurt Rin and you are nothing to me."  
  
"I thought you wanted me to be your mate?"  
  
"I wanted you to be Rin's companion." his voice had an edge to it.  
  
"Rin is just an ingenerate human girl who knows nothing." she strolled over to him.  
  
Sesshoumaru's eyes went red, "Leave now!"  
  
Kay began to walk out of Sesshoumaru study, "Fine, I hope you have a nice life Rin." then shut the door.  
  
The female youkai went down the hall to Rin's room. Kay quietly knocked on the door, and then pushed it open to see Rin on her bed with a tear stained face.  
  
"Rin, I just wanted to talk to you. I will leave if you want me to."  
  
The young girl saw Kay was about the leave, "No, its ok I need someone to talk to."  
  
"Well Rin I just wanted to tell you that I am going to be your new mother."  
  
Rin felt the tears start to come again, "I know Sesshoumaru told me."  
  
"I always wanted a beautiful and intelligent girl like you Rin."  
  
She smiled at her "new" mother.  
  
"You know I am sorry about this because I knew that you did love him, but maybe it's for the best. You know you are just a human and he needs someone who is a youkai. He just happened to find little old me."  
  
Rin shook her head trying to show that she understood why Kay had to be with Sesshoumaru. (A/N: Rin still thinks that Kay is a friend to her.)  
  
"Oh Rin, he is so nice and sweet to me no wonder you fell in love with him."  
  
Right then Rin would have done anything if she could just slap her for that comment.  
  
"You know what Kay I am really happy for you, but I think that I need sometime alone."  
  
"Of course," she padded Rin on the head, "but Rin I'll be gone for awhile though because Sesshoumaru he needs for me to go somewhere for him, but I will be back okay? Oh I know I'll make a great mother and who knows maybe you will have a brother or sister like you always wanted." she gave Rin a smirk as she rubbed her abdomen as if she was pregnant and already showing.  
  
"Thank you," Rin gave her a hug.  
  
Kay waved goodbye then left the young girl.  
  
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Sesshoumaru went down to Rin's room to talk to her about everything, that he wanted her, that he loved her, and that Kay was a mistake.  
  
He grabbed the door handle, but before he had the chance to open, the door Rin opened it.  
  
The young girl screamed bloodily murder.  
  
"Sorry I did not know that you were coming out of your room. Forgive me I did not mean to scare you." he smiled at her and tried to touch her raven hair. Rin backed away from his grasp.  
  
"What are you doing here?"  
  
"I need to talk to you about something that has been on my mind for quite some time now."  
  
"I already know what it is."  
  
"You do?" he looked at her questioning if they were talking about the same thing.  
  
"Kay told me that you send her away for a while because she needed to do something for you. She told me that I would maybe have a new brother or sister, but she was ecstatic that I was to be her daughter."  
  
"That is not true Rin I sent her away because I do not want to be with her. She is not to be your mother." he took a deep breath, "I want you."  
  
Rin blew off what he said and began to walk away.  
  
"Rin did you hear me?"  
  
"Do you expect me to believe you? You have lied to me so many times Sesshoumaru. I don't know what to think or how to act."  
  
"Rin, I don't want her." he took her by the shoulders and slammed her against the wall.  
  
"Sesshoumaru don't lie to me I know that you are in love with her, she told me. I know that you want her. You showed me that the other night."  
  
"All I want is to make you happy."  
  
"If you want to make me happy then leave, I don't need you anymore." she removed his hands from her shoulders and walked out to the garden.  
  
Sesshoumaru went in his study and did not come out.  
  
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Rin awoke the next morning still remembering her harsh words she said to Sesshoumaru. [How can I believe him? He keeps telling me that he does not want Kay, then goes, and tires to have a child with her. I cannot deal with someone is going to treat me this way. I want someone to love me. I am not here for his convinces.]  
  
She laid in bed for a while until she noticed a note on her nightstand. There was nothing special to it; it just said Rin in cursive.  
  
The young girl opened the letter and began to read,  
  
~Dear Rin,  
  
I know that you refuse to listen to me, but you need to know how I feel. I know you never want to see me again and I respect that.  
  
The day I told you to meet me in the garden I was going to tell you that I wanted you to be my mate. That I am in love with you, however I looked out my window from my study and saw you and that boy hugging and kissing. I thought you could not cause me pain, but you did. I did not know what to do, I knew at the time was you had picked someone else to make you happy. I never wanted Kay she was just there and when she was, I was thinking of you. The only reason I ever let her in was I thought I lost you to that youkai. I did not want to feel that pain anymore and granted that was a brainless way of dealing with it hope you can understand that.  
  
I will always regret doing that, but I know that I will never regret kissing you that day in the garden. I never thought I you would have me, however after that moment I knew I never wanted to let you go. When you asked me to stay the night with you, I do not regret that either. I did not sleep that night, all I could think about was you. Even though you ever right in front of me I did want to close my eyes and wake up to find it all to be a dream. Rin, I know that you will not believe me, but to know that you read this will make me just as happy as if I were to tell you. You were the one thing I ever wanted and I always loved you.  
  
Sesshoumaru  
  
P.S.  
  
I did not make love to Kay. ~  
  
Rin folded up the note and ran to go find Sesshoumaru. She went to his study he was not there; high and low, she looked for him. After some time Rin went back into his bedroom to see if he might have been there.  
  
Rin opened the door only to see Jaken standing in the demon lord's room.  
  
"Where is he? Oh, please I must find him." she was still clutching Sesshoumaru's confession.  
  
"I don't know."  
  
She looked at him with tear-filled eyes pleading for him to tell her.  
  
"He is to be leaving at this every moment."  
  
"What? Where?"  
  
"Where I don't know, but I know why. You, Rin you wanted him to leave and so he did. Lord Sesshoumaru never wanted to make you unhappy, so he is doing what you asked of him."  
  
"No! He can leave I must find him." she ran to the door.  
  
Jaken could not just let Sesshoumaru walk out of Rin's life, even though he knew that the demon lord would kill him for this, he had to.  
  
"Rin you might want to go to your room. You just might find what you are looking for."  
  
She ran down the hall, opening the door to her room. Rin found Sesshoumaru standing by her bed.  
  
Walking towards him, she tried to make no noise, but that attempt failed. Rin stepped on a floor broad that squeaked.  
  
"I wanted to give this to you that day I wanted to meet you in the garden." He threw a white kimono on her bed.  
  
Rin examined the gown; it was just like her mothers. Tears began to form in her eyes.  
  
"I remember how you said that you always wanted to have a kimono like your mothers. So, I had one made for you."  
  
"Why?" she asked holding the beautiful copy of her mother's gown.  
  
"I was going to ask you be my mate and I remember you saying that you wanted a kimono like that for your wedding day. I know that youkai do not have weddings, but I thought. you would want something like that for our mating."  
  
Rin looked down at the kimono; it was just as she described it to him. Never in all of her life did she think that Sesshoumaru could ever want her. Tears fell as did her distrust in him.  
  
"Please" she looked up at him, "Don't leave me Sesshoumaru."  
  
Rin wrapped her arms around his neck, "I'm in love with you."  
  
When her words reached his ears, he wrapped his arms around her waist.  
  
"I won't leave you," he gripped her tighter.  
  
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!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS NOT THE ENDING!!!!!!!!!  
  
A/N: The friend "Kay" is not a friend. She knew that Rin loved him, but went after him for her-self.  
  
Thx for all the reviews I would never let yall go with out an ending I am not that evil. Its just I need to see if you really did like because I did not want to waste my time writing a story no one was going to read. ANYWAYS Thank you so much for the kind reviews. Love yall! Hugs and kisses! ^.^ Oh and Review! ^.^ 


	7. Trust Me

WARNING must be 17+ to read the first part of this chapter.  
  
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Rin walked into the room wearing the white kimono that Sesshoumaru had made for her.  
  
Sesshoumaru walked up to his beautiful Rin and wrapped his arms around her slender waist. He placed gentle kisses on her shoulder moving towards her pale neck.  
  
Rin melted into his embrace, with very kiss he placed on her soft skin drove her mad.  
  
The demon lord took her up into his arms and laid her on to the side of his bed. He leaned on top of her and whispered, "I won't hurt you." He gave her a comforting smile knowing that this would be her first time for anything intimate like this.  
  
Rin smiled back at the man she loved, "I love you."  
  
Sesshoumaru brushed his lips down her collarbone; he pulled her silk kimono down to her waist.  
  
Rin moaned at his actions, running her hands through his sliver hair.  
  
"Oh. Sesshoumaru.. please." Her body ached at the thought of what could be happening between them.  
  
He slid the gown off her body revealing her slim waist and glowing white skin.  
  
He removed his clothing that was trapping his from what he wanted and needed.  
  
Sesshoumaru moved his soon to be mate on to the pillows positioning himself on top of her. She felt his arousal on her toned thigh, making her wonder how bad this may hurt her.  
  
Before he took her, Sesshoumaru kissed her on her forehead, "Trust me." They gave in to their desire for each other in only way the people truly in love could.  
  
He started to kiss the sensitive skin between her shoulder and neck. She moaned right in to his ear because of his actions, with that, he bit down to mark her as his. They both reached the breaking point.  
  
Sesshoumaru collapsed on top of his mate then taking her into his arms the demon lord cradling her into his body.  
  
Sesshoumaru brushed back her ebony hair and licked the mark he had given her.  
  
Rin sighed as she felt complete happiness flow over her body. Never did she think that she could happen between her and the Demon Lord of the Western Lands. Rin was content.  
  
Sesshoumaru pulled into his protective arms to let her sleep. He would never let her go and would never let them part.  
  
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The next morning Rin awoke to her mate standing by the window looking out at the new day, "How do you feel?"  
  
"I feel wonderful, Sesshoumaru." (A/N: she does not mean physically, but in her heart.)  
  
Pleased with her answer he sat next on their bed and tenderly kissed her pink lips.  
  
Rin whimpered as she lost the warmth of his lips, "Rin, I have to leave for the day. The other lords have asked for my presents and I must leave."  
  
"Will you be back tonight?" She sat up covering her nakedness with the black silk sheets, even though he had already seen her with less than a sheet on her body.  
  
He chuckled at her innocent question, which to him only brought naughty thoughts, "Yes, I will." Sesshoumaru kissed her again then left the room.  
  
Rin laid back down in the sea of blanks,[ I never knew that my innocent crush would turn into this.]  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ It was sticky night as Rin walked down hallway trying to tie up her hair. She had left Sesshoumaru to his meeting all day and she was going to meet him in the garden because their dinner turned into one of Sesshoumaru's meetings.  
  
When she turned by Sesshoumaru's bedroom she heard giggling. Rin kept would never do anything. I mean he told me that he loved me. This is wrong I should be able to trust the person I love. What if? No, Sesshoumaru would be heart broken if he knew you doubted his love for me.]  
  
She stood there by his door for a while debating if she should go in. Finial she decided to go in, as she began to open the door a crash came from down the hall. Rin turned to see where the noise came from. The door shut as she turned, only giving her a chance to see Sesshoumaru's kimono. [He must have been in there getting ready to meet her in the garden.] Rin walked towards the noise.  
  
"Do you think that she saw us?" Kay grinned at the male youkai wearing Sesshoumaru's clothes.  
  
"How could she not? The door opened; it had to be her." the youkai took off The Demon Lord's robes and put them back into the closet. Mean while Kay put a letter on Sesshoumaru's nightstand.  
  
"Why are you doing this to lady Rin? What did she do to hurt you?"  
  
"That brat took the greatest youkai and I was to have him, but she just had to fall in love with him. Therefore, I am going to make her pay for messing up my life. After this, she will never go back to him. Rin is a human but she is not dumb enough to get her heart broken a third time. Now we had  
  
better leave. I think our work here is done." Kay grabbed his hand and they went out the window.  
  
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Sesshoumaru impatiently tapped his claws on the wood table waiting for their business dinner to end. All day the demon lord had gone through meeting after meeting.  
  
"Well gentlemen I think that should do for the evening." Sesshoumaru got up from his chair.  
  
The other lords followed Sesshoumaru out of the dinning room to the front door of the castle. When they said their farewells, Sesshoumaru went to go take a much-needed bath then to his Rin.  
  
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Rin found the noise was nothing more than a maid being clumsily. Not wanting to wait for him in the garden, she went back to his room.  
  
She opened the door, when she looked in she saw no one there. When the young girl confirmed that it must have been her imagination, Rin saw a letter on the nightstand. She slowly walked up the note, as she got closer to the letter; Rin noticed a name, 'Sesshoumaru.'  
  
"Sesshoumaru" she whispered as she picked it up. Rin gave into her curiosity and opened the letter. She dropped the note as if it had burned her.  
  
"Kay?"  
  
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Sesshoumaru sank into the welcoming water. He had been waiting for the night to come. All day the only thought on his mind was getting back to Rin. Now that they were together, Sesshoumaru felt that nothing could go wrong.  
  
He finished bathing and went to his room to get ready for Rin. As Sesshoumaru walked towards his room, he saw the light glow of candles. He opened the door; he saw the back of Rin she was shaking uncontrollably.  
  
Sesshoumaru walked up to her, "Rin, are you alright?" he slid his hands around her waist.  
  
Rin pulled out of his grasp, "How could you?"  
  
"I don't think I understand what you accuse me of? How could I what?"  
  
She turned to face him, "You made me believe that you loved me, but all you wanted was to satisfy your lust. How could you do that to me? After you." her emotions took over her as she began to cry.  
  
"Made you believe? Rin I do love you." he reached for her hand. "Don't touch me! You slept with her! You slept with her after you told me you loved me and made me your mate." She could not look at him. How could he have done this to her?  
  
Sesshoumaru lightly placed his hand under her chin to make her look at him, "What makes you believe that I don't love you? " he looked straight into her red stained eyes.  
  
She tore her face way from his grip. "I was dumb enough to think that you really felt something for me." Rin paused trying to blink back the tears.  
  
Sesshoumaru touched her arm, making her lock eyes with him. Quickly she lowered her gaze at the ground, "I'm sorry."  
  
He did not respond stunned by her words, but then Rin faced him again,  
  
"I'm sorry that I made you feel like you had to fulfill my stupid crush. I'm sorry that you cannot be with Kay because of me. I'm sorry that you made me your mate. And I'm sorry that I ever loved you." Rin turned on her heel not wanting him to see her cry again.  
  
Sesshoumaru was crushed and confused. What had made Rin act like this? He turned to see what she had read. As he picked up the letter he saw what would make any lover upset.  
  
~Sesshoumaru,  
  
Thanks for a wonderful time. I know that we could not spend the entire night in each other's arms, but for the few moments that we were, was tremendous. I know that you regret being with Rin, but I forgive you for making her your mate instead of me. Hope to see you soon.  
  
~Kay  
  
He was as shocked as Rin must have been. How could this of happened? Sesshoumaru stayed in his room he was not going to go after Rin and make even more upset. She needed time to cool down. However, that was only thing he wanted do was to talk to her. Sesshoumaru could not let her go the night thinking that he did that to her.  
  
***  
  
Without knowing really what he was going to approach her about the topic, Sesshoumaru busted open her bedroom door.  
  
Rin laid crumpled on the bed; she looked up to see him standing in the doorway.  
  
"Rin, I never did that and you might be sorry for loving, but I don't regret ever falling for you."  
  
"Please leave me alone." she sat up.  
  
He moved closer to her.  
  
"How much pain do you think I can with stand? It's just like before you tell me that it's not true and what am I to believe you?"  
  
Sesshoumaru reached her bed, "What I cannot believe is that you would just assume that I would hurt you, that you would never even give me the chance to defend my-self, Rin."  
  
"I had no reason not to believe the letter. You were gone all day and I thought that Kay was gone forever, but I guess not."  
  
He bent down to touch her cheek, "The day I cast Kay out of my castle she was gone for good and I never loved her. You are my mate."  
  
Rin was not going to fall for it again,"Get out!"  
  
He pushed Rin down on the bed pinning her arms above her, "Rin stop acting like this. I don't understand why it's hard for you have trust in me."  
  
"Get out!"  
  
He tightened his grip.  
  
"Fine if you won't leave then I will." She tried to get up.  
  
Sesshoumaru picked her up and placed her in front of a mirror. He took hold of the collar on her kimono and pulled it down, exposing her shoulder.  
  
"Do you see that mark?" he voice was cold.  
  
Rin looked at what Sesshoumaru had done to her the night before.  
  
"You will not see that on any women in the western lands because I did not love them. So, you may not trust me or believe me, but you belong to me  
  
and will never leave me. That is how much I love you." Sesshoumaru let her go and walked out.  
  
Rin slumped to the floor with her head in her hands.  
  
To be continued...  
  
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A/N: Sorry if everything seems like it is happening to quickly. Anyways please review to tell me what you think about my story I would love to hear yall's ideas. Thx! ^.^ 


	8. A Simple Request

She lay in her bed that night trying to muffle her sobs into the supple pillow. Once again, Rin was attempting to grasps that maybe the man she loved was not hurting her. For the second time he had wounded her frail heart and the thought of allowing him to do it again brought fresh tears.  
  
A knock at the door startled Rin from her thoughts not giving her time to answer. The door swung open and there stood Sesshoumaru's servant Jaken, "Lady Rin, Lord Sesshoumaru wants you to meet him for lunch."  
  
Rin turned her back to the toad.  
  
"So. I would advise that you come when you are dress." he left her there.  
  
She had never slept so late in the day, but Rin wondered why bother. All that was out of comfort of her room was Sesshoumaru and the womon he really loved.  
  
Rin got dressed, but did not meet the demon lord as he had asked of her. Instead, she went to the garden avoiding any contact with Sesshoumaru.  
  
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Sesshoumaru knew she would never show and stayed in his study, but thought if he had requested her presents that maybe she would leave her room.  
  
Sesshoumaru knew that what he said to her last had hit the young girl hard, but did not think Rin that would confine herself to that vast and empty room. He did not think of her as his slave or to that affect, but Rin was his to love.  
  
He got up from his desk and noticed a young girl seated on a bench, his Rin. Sesshoumaru thought of how last time she was in the garden he was about to confess his love for her and how they would be able to be together. [So much has between us that we never dream would.]  
  
His blood boiled just thinking of how yet again Kay had ruin there love for each other. Rin was the one thing he loved and the one thing that ever loved him back.  
  
Sesshoumaru turned away from the window not wanting to look at what he knew he could never have again.  
  
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Rin sat on the bench and surprisingly was not crying; all-night and late into the morning she had mourned for the loss of his love.  
  
She gazed at the lush green grass then a memory came to her, Sesshoumaru and her sitting in that grass and him taking her into his arms and almost kissing her, rubbing her back, and placing her head on his chest.  
  
The young girl sighed at the loving memory, "If only I could believe that you loved me once." She touched her shoulder and felt the mark he gave her only because of sex.  
  
"Rin." a deep voice came from behind her.  
  
For a moment, she thought she could just run back to her room and never face him, but it had to happen sometime. They had to talk.  
  
"What can I do for you Lord Sesshoumaru?"  
  
He winced as she address him formally, "I have a request."  
  
"Oh really and what does that entail?"  
  
"You are to move into my bed chambers."  
  
She turned and looked at as if she had gone deaf, "Wha-"  
  
He cut her off with his reason, "I have told the other Lords that I have chosen a mate and I cannot let it be seen in my castle that our bond is breaking. It would show that if I could not control my tie with my mate and that I am a weak ruler." He paused to see if she would object to his request, but Rin stayed silence.  
  
"Very well I will see that your belongings are brought into my - our chambers." Sesshoumaru began to walk away from her.  
  
"Sesshoumaru"  
  
He turned with anticipation.  
  
"I will not be hurt by you for a third time."  
  
"Why do you think I will hurt? You said you did not love me." he spoke with sorrow in his voice.  
  
Rin did not think he had heard her when she said she was sorry for loving him granted it was a lie.  
  
Sesshoumaru looked at her face as she registered that her words had indeed wounded him.  
  
Rin stood and bowed then waited for him to leave her and go back to whatever he was doing before.  
  
The youkai bowed then headed back to the castle to see to it that her material possessions were brought to his room.  
  
As Rin watched, the distances between them become farther and farther, she bit her lip trying to compose herself from another emotional break down.  
  
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Once all of Rin's belongings were brought into his chambers, Sesshoumaru wonder how she was going to take it. He did not intend for this arrangement to bring them back into each other arms, but he needed to be close to her no matter how it was done.  
  
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Rin stayed away from the castle into the evening, but she knew that she had to go back there and sleep. Sleep in the same bed with Sesshoumaru. The thought made her cringe.  
  
The young girl walked into the dark castle and made it to hallway. However she avoided going to 'their' room and instead Rin went to go bathe.  
  
After staying in the water until it became cold, she creped into her new champers. She saw Sesshoumaru lying in bed already.  
  
Rin slid in between the silk sheets trying her best not to touch him. She hoped that sleep would come fast so she could hear or feel Sesshoumaru's presents. Unfortunately, sleep did not welcome her. Rin laid in silence listening to him breathe. It was not deep. She let out a great sigh.  
  
Suddenly Sesshoumaru got out of their bed and began to pace around the room.  
  
"Rin, I cannot do this. I know you do not care for me or love me, but lying next to you knowing this.." he turned his back to her.  
  
"Sesshoumaru?" she sat up.  
  
He sat on the end of the bed his head in his hands.  
  
Rin inched closer to him and placed her hand on his naked back, "Sesshoumaru.I still love you. I don't even know what it is like not to, but it is hard for me to give into you."  
  
Silences.  
  
"You wanted her to be your mate. You told me that she was to be my mother figure in my life. How can you expect me not to believe her words in that letter?"  
  
"If you had any trust me you would know that I was at a meeting and that my love for you is far greater than lust."  
  
[It was true, if I did trust him and love him, then I would have perhaps asked someone in the castle of his whereabouts.] Rin thought.  
  
He began to get up and walk away from her, "I saw you in your room though."  
  
Sesshoumaru turned at her response, "You saw me? How, I was in a meeting and the only time I was ever in here was when I saw you reading that letter."  
  
"I saw glimpse of your robes. I remember because then a maid dropped something and when I turned away I saw it."  
  
"I can assure you I was never in here at any part of the day. I have witnesses knowing where I was at."  
  
"I also heard a woman's laugh. That is why I do not believe you. I had thought that you were with someone in this room and the note confirmed my belief that you were."  
  
"If the first time you thought her and I were together then why would I deny that I was and then go back to her?"  
  
Rin tried to think of a reason, but came up with none.  
  
"If I had a chance to be with her then I would have taken the first chance I got, but I didn't I stayed with you." He sat back down on the edge of the bed.  
  
Rin moved towards him and wrapped her arms around his waist. Placing her head on Sesshoumaru's shoulder, "You're right. If you had wanted her, you would not have gone to all the trouble of making me believe you loved me; especially if you could have her." Realizing that he had a good point Rin still had one question.  
  
"Why didn't you choose her? I mean Kay is a great candidate to be at your side to rule."  
  
He turned and looked at Rin, "She didn't love me."  
  
The young girl raised her head from the youkai's shoulder, "Are you saying that you were in love with her?"  
  
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A/N: I hope you all like how the story is going so far. I know I am putting Rin and Sesshoumaru through a lot. 


	9. Lust or Love

The young girl raised her head from the youkai's shoulder, "Are you saying that you were in love with her?"  
  
"The love you have for me, I could never find in anyone else. You make me happy, Rin. Why would I want to lose that?" Sesshoumaru pulled her around and placed her in his lap.  
  
"Why would I want to lose you?" he smiled.  
  
"That wasn't my question. Were you in love with her?" Rin stood to face him.  
  
"Rin, I never.. I mean I didn't" Sesshoumaru could not find the words to tell that he did have feelings, but not the kind she thought he had.  
  
"Listen, Rin I never feel that way"  
  
"You loved her didn't you? Didn't you?"  
  
He could not look at her. Sesshoumaru felt ashamed that he could have felt anything towards Kay, but he had. However, it was not a feeling of love, but lust.  
  
"You did and then you did that with me." The anger building up in Rin was too much for her to handle. This man for far too long had betrayed her.  
  
When Sesshoumaru looked up he saw and felt was Rin's hand make contact with his face.  
  
He touched his cheek, there were scratches from the young girl's nails and now they began to bleed.  
  
Rin covered her mouth. She never meant to draw blood, but she wanted him to be physically hurting the way she was emotionally.  
  
"I never loved her." He turned way from her and started to leave the room. "But I did want her and for that I am sorry." He shut the door.  
  
Rin sat down, [What have I done? Now he will hate me forever. I never should have struck him. Sesshoumaru does not love her, but he wanted her. Though, it was not the same, he told me before, but how can I..] Rin realized her mistake she had pushed away the only man that loved her and because of what? What a jealous girl had said in a letter. She could not let him leave her. She loved Sesshoumaru too much to let that happen.  
  
Rin ran out of their room, she heard footsteps down the hall. The young girl got to the top of the stairs, looking down she saw Sesshoumaru about to leave. Not knowing what to do to make him stop Rin yelled out the only thing that came to her mind.  
  
"I love you."  
  
Sesshoumaru turned and looked up.  
  
"I love you, Sesshoumaru. Please don't leave, I never meant to." over whelmed by the thought of him leaving her forever, Rin could not finish.  
  
Turning back towards the door, the demon lord tried to ignore her words, but failed completely. Sesshoumaru faced the stairs, but this time there was no one. He started to climb the stairs, only hearing muffled screams.  
  
Almost flying to the top of the staircase, Sesshoumaru only caught a glimpse of male youkai taking Rin out the window.  
  
Sesshoumaru was about to go after her but was stopped by a chilling voice, "I wouldn't do that if I were you."  
  
He turned to see the whore, Kay, standing with a hand on her hip and a grin on her face.  
  
"You wouldn't want your precious Rin to die would you?" Kay laughed.  
  
"YOU!!" Sesshoumaru turned towards her with his claws ready to kill.  
  
She jumped back, "You shouldn't kill me if you want her back. If I die, then so does she." the wench relaxed as the demon lord retracted his perilous claws and eyes went back to a calm amber.  
  
"What do I have to do?"  
  
"That's more like it, my dear Sesshoumaru."  
  
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"Mfuaffuwafa"  
  
"What did you say?" the youkai looked at the gagged girl. He pulled the white scarf out of her mouth.  
  
"I said who are you and why are you doing this?"  
  
"Well, my lady, I have been sent by Lady Kay because you took what was hers'"  
  
"What I took? What did I take from Kay?" still tied Rin tried to work her way towards the fire.  
  
"Lord Sesshoumaru, you took him away from her and if the demon lord does not do what Kay asks of him." the youkai looked up from the fire, "then you will be killed."  
  
Rin held back the tears, "And what does Lord Sesshoumaru have to do?"  
  
A sorrowful look appeared on his face.  
  
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	10. A Love That Never Happened

"What do I have to do, Kay?"  
  
Kay tossed him a dragger, "This dragger will make so you and your precious Rin never . mated."  
  
"What? There is no such thi-"  
  
"There is such a dragger and you are holding it right now."  
  
"Why a dragger?"  
  
"Rin's heart holds all of the passion she has for you. so once you stab her in the heart with it, Rin will never remember you or that night." Kay began to walk down the hallway.  
  
"Her mind may not remember, but what of her body? Rin was a virgin when we mated."  
  
"What? Oh, yes her body. Well since this dragger is to take away her memory of the mating. Her body, well it will do away with Rin's mark you so willingly gave to her and she will never be able have children. It is just a little set back." the dark wavy haired youkai grinned at the torture she was putting Sesshoumaru and his mate through.  
  
"I will do what you ask if it will save Rin, but I will not have it to where she cannot have a life at all."  
  
"It's just children. She won't care my dear Sesshoumaru," she purred," However, I would like if after this problem is solved maybe we could have some pups of are own." with that invention, she nipped at his ear.  
  
The demon lord walked away from her, "Let's just get this over with." He knew there would be no way out.  
  
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Rin looked at the man across from the fire, "I asked, what does he have to do?"  
  
"Lady Rin, he has to do something no mate would ever want to do."  
  
She looked closer at the face. She remembered that face and the sorrow in his voice. "Come into the light."  
  
"What?" he fell back.  
  
"Come here I want to see your face."  
  
"No, that's okay you just stay over there and I'll stay over here."  
  
Rin got up and walked over to the young youkai, "It's you! You are the young boy from the kitchen."  
  
"I am so sorry my lady. I could not stop her she has my mate and said she was going to kill her if I did not help and." he rambled on as he clutched to the girl's leg.  
  
"Wait, what did you say about killing?"  
  
He wiped away his tears, "Lady Kay said that if I did not help her take you away, then she would kill my mate."  
  
"How do you know that she would do that?"  
  
"She has her locked up somewhere so I would not be able to back out and go find her."  
  
"So, Kay black mailed you into this and now what you have to kill me?"  
  
"No! That's not her plan."  
  
"Well would you be so kind as to tell what is going on?"  
  
His sandy blonde hair covered his face, "I am sorry Lady Rin, but I do not know what is to happen to you."  
  
Rin flopped back down, "Great. Well what about Lord Sesshoumaru, what will happen to him?"  
  
"I imagine that she will have him some how fall in love with her."  
  
Rin pulled her knees to her chest and sat in silence trying to soak in the conversation.  
  
"She hates you; you know and will do whatever it takes to get what she wants."  
  
"I know" she let out a great sigh, "That is why we cannot let your mate die."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Does she know where you have taken me?"  
  
"Ummm no, but she knows that it is somewhere in the forest."  
  
"Good. Then we can go look for your mate."  
  
"But why?"  
  
"Because if she doesn't have her then she can't use her death against us." Rin started to head out into the forest.  
  
He shot up off the ground, "But I don't know where my mate is."  
  
"Well then we have time to look. Kay will not be here or come looking for us for a while. So we have time to go look."  
  
He looked at her dumbfounded.  
  
"Come on" she took him by the hand.  
  
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"Don't you want to hear the rest of the agreement?"  
  
He turned back and was now face to face with her.  
  
"Sesshoumaru, if you think that all I want is for you to destroy your relationship with Rin. You are sadly mistaken." He walked into his chambers Kay following right behind.  
  
"What more could you want from me?"  
  
"To rule at your side and have a child together."  
  
Sesshoumaru stayed silence.  
  
She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him "We could start right now." She pressed her lips roughly almost bruising on his.  
  
He began to push her off then pulled her back taking control over the situation.  
  
His grip on her waist tightened making her curves fit into his. Kay moaned at his actions and shoved him back onto the bed. The female youkai placed kisses on his face and throat. Sesshoumaru tried harder than ever not to throw her off him, but if he could pull this off for a while he maybe able to find out where Rin was. However, at a high price, he did not know for how long or how far he could let himself go through this, but he had to get her to trust him.  
  
Sesshoumaru sat up setting Kay next to him, "We should first take care of Rin. Where is she?"  
  
She kissed his shoulder, "I don't know where she is. I had a youkai take her somewhere in the forest. We are to find them so then you can stab dear little Rin."  
  
"Perhaps we should go find him and Rin." He stood into front of the window and offered his hand to the wench.  
  
"If you insistent." Kay gave him a pleased smile.  
  
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A/N: Hmmmm... please review. I know that this story is taking forever and that it's starting to become boring, but I will try to make more interesting. I mean the story is like a soap opera where everything is taking forever. However, I will try to update sooner. Oh and thx for the reviews so far. ^.^soon. Bye! ^.^ 


	11. Meeting New Friends

Mature Content: must be 17+ to read. It is rated R!!  
  
"Lady Rin, it is morning now should we start looking for my mate again?"  
  
Rin rose from the patch of grass that was her bed that night, "We should, however we do not know a direction that she would be in."  
  
The young youkai looked in every direction, "I think I heard Lady Kay say once that they would to put her in the summer castle that lies in the north."  
  
"Then we should go that way. Something is better than nothing." she gave him a weak smile and they started towards the north.  
  
As they walked, Rin realized that she did not know the boys' name "Excuse I know it is a little late for introductions, but what is your name?"  
  
The boy blushed, "Yasuo"  
  
The duo continued to walk.  
  
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{The breeze from Rin's window played with his pearly white hair, as he entered her room. Sesshoumaru reached their bed to see her pale bare back; he kissed Rin's fragile body, her back was warm from the sun. The gentle kisses turned into nips and bites. She turned around to see her husband, Sesshoumaru smiled at her.  
  
"Good mor-"the young girls' lips were captured, enabling her to finish her greeting.  
  
Sesshoumaru began to lift her to his warm body hugging her small frame, "I have missed you, Rin. Never leave me again."  
  
"I promise, my love." She lifted his head to look into his golden orbs, seeing tears forming. "I love you, Sesshoumaru."  
  
The demon lord kissed her forcibly, acting as if that would be their last. She moaned into his mouth allowing his tongue explore.  
  
Rubbing small circles on Rin's lower back, Sesshoumaru kissed down to her breasts. Moaning louder into his soft pointed ear, Rin began to lie back on the bed.  
  
Still shaking from his actions, Rin begged for Sesshoumaru, "Please, I need you inside me."  
  
Sesshoumaru answered his mate, "Tell me what you want Rin." He waited, although he was more than ready to take her.  
  
"You, Sesshoumaru..please." she bucked against him.  
  
He kissed her swollen red lips and thrust inside her. She was so hot he almost could not take it.  
  
Sesshoumaru moved faster and harder as Rin commended. They bucked and came together.}  
  
"Lord Sesshoumaru, oh Lord Sesshoumaru. What are you dreaming about?"  
  
The Lord of the Western awoke to find Kay running her hand threw silky hair.  
  
"I was not dreaming." he sat up and moved away.  
  
"Do not lie to me Sesshoumaru; I saw the look on your face you were in pure ecstasy."  
  
["Sesshoumaru, please harder." Rin gasped bowing her body.] He shook his head trying to forget his dream; especially Rin's face, body, and scent.  
  
The vile woman move closer to him, "Tell me Sesshoumaru was it about me?" She rubbed her hand up and down his thigh by his erection cause by Rin.  
  
"Do not address me so informal Lady Kay." The demon lord walked away. Sesshoumaru stiffed the air. Nothing, not even the male's scent he could pick up.  
  
She disregarded his request, "How far do you think they are a day or two ahead of us?" Kay looked at Sesshoumaru waiting for a reply. "Sesshoumaru, are you listening to me?"  
  
"I cannot get their scent they are too far away."  
  
Kay caught up to Sesshoumaru and they walked further into the deep forest.  
  
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"There it is Lady Rin," Yasuo, pointed to the castle on the hill.  
  
"Let's go." She started for the gray and dark castle, but the young demon stopped her.  
  
"Wait won't the guards kill us?"  
  
"I have a plan no need to worry, dear boy." Rin patted his head to reassure Yasuo.  
  
When they reached the fortress the guards were ready for them, "State your name and business?" spoke a growling wolf demon. The other just stood there ready to attack if need be.  
  
"I am Lady Rin." She stood tall like a queen of the western lands should, "I need a place to stay I have been traveling for many nights now. I request to be let into the palace."  
  
"And who are you to Lord Sesshoumaru?" obviously they had not been informed about Rin.  
  
She pulled the collar of her golden kimono to the side to show them the mark of Sesshoumaru. "I am the mate of Sesshoumaru and request to be let into my castle."  
  
They stumbled around trying to open the door for her, "Forgive us my Lady; we were not informed of Lord Sesshoumaru gaining a mate."  
  
They walked into the murky palace; there was another guard waiting, "Tell me where the prisoner is."  
  
"Who let you in here wench?" the dark haired demon poked Rin and Yasuo with a spear.  
  
"I am..."  
  
"Lady Rin, how good it is to see you." the demon lord approached. "I have not seen you since Lord Sesshoumaru told us that you were to become his mate."  
  
Rin just stared at the silvered haired lord. He was a dog demon and had marks like Sesshoumaru; however, they were different shapes, lightening bolt lines on the cheeks and cross shape on the forehead.  
  
"Forgive me; I am Kane lord of the Eastern lands. I am here because of Lord Sesshoumaru's generosity. My kingdom was being repaired from a war; my mate and I came here to stay until it is finished." He smiled.  
  
His friendliness caught Rin off guard, "Greetings Lord Kane, I am Lady Rin."  
  
"Lady Rin of the Western Lands," short-blacked haired women with similar marking walked up to greet Rin and the youkai. "I am Lady Aiko of the Eastern Lands it is an honor to finally meet Lord Sesshoumaru beloved mate." her fangs showed when she smiled.  
  
"Lady Rin, pray tell what are you doing here especially in these weather conditions."  
  
"Excuse me?" Rin turned to see that it was now raining, "We have I mean, I have come here to release a prisoner."  
  
"What do you mean Lady Rin there are no prisoners here."  
  
Rin could not believe what she heard, "What do you mean there are none here at all or that there are none since you have been here?"  
  
They looked at each other then Lady Aiko looked at the young girl and boy, "Oh wait there was a young human girl who was brought here only a few months ago."  
  
"Is that who you are looking for Lady Rin?" Lord Kane's tone had lost its joyful tune.  
  
"Yes, where are the dungeons?"  
  
They just looked at Rin and did not answer.  
  
Yusuo spoke up, "Where is she? Where is my mate, Kaiya?"  
  
"She is to be put to death tonight." Aiko face fell after she spoke the news.  
  
Silences fell all around them.  
  
Rin could not take it, "Why? What did the girl do?"  
  
"They said that she tried to kill Lord Sesshoumaru and there is no way for her sentence to be changed." The lords' voice had sorrow in it. Rin thought it was probably for now knowing Kaiya was the boys' mate.  
  
"Well I am Lady of these lands I will see who and who is not put to death."  
  
"The girl attempted to kill your mate, Lady Rin. Do you take his life so lightly?" concern and confusion crossed Lady Aiko's face.  
  
"No, but I know for a fact that she did not try to kill Lord Sesshoumaru."  
  
"I am sorry, but it is useless to try and fight this Lady Rin. The girl ."  
  
Lord Kane was interrupted by they boy, "She has a name, its Kaiya use it when speaking of my mate."  
  
The Lord of the Eastern lands would have killed the young youkai on the spot, but his heart bleed for Yasuo. "Kaiya will die no matter what you do."  
  
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A/N: Tell me what you think!! Review bye! ^.^ 


	12. Forgive Me

"I will not let this happen. Kaiya will not die because of a false accusation." Rin started for the dungeons, but stopped. "Where are the dungeons?"  
  
"Lady Rin, please you will not get anywhere by doing this just let the girl have her punishment." Lord Kane turned away from them.  
  
"Just down the stairs and to the right." Lady Aiko's creamy white hand pointed the direction where Kaiya was being held.  
  
"Thank you, Lady Aiko." Rin grabbed the Yasuo's hand.  
  
When the turned right at the end of the stairs they saw a young girl, brown locks that were dull, unwashed. As they got closer, Rin saw that her eyes her red from crying. [Poor girl.]  
  
Yasuo ran to his caged mate, "Kaiya are you hurt? What have they done to you?" he shook the rusty bars.  
  
She did not speak, only looked at him and smiled.  
  
Rin approached the cell, the girls face and throat was blue and purple; someone had beaten her. She wished she had the nose of an iunyoukai to be able to smell if Kaiya had been raped.  
  
"We are going to get you out of here ok?" Rin looked around for keys to open the jail door. Over on the wall across from Kaiya's cell there was a set of keys. When Rin finally got the door open, Yasuo ran inside and held his mate and softly chanted that he love her.  
  
"We should leave now before Kay sends someone and find out what we have done."  
  
He nodded and picked up Kaiya. As they walked out the girl grabbed Rin's arm, "Thank you, Lady Rin we owe you our happiness." her voice was hoarse.  
  
Sesshoumaru's mate turned away before they saw the tears streaming down her face. "You are welcome, now this way." They reached the top of the stairs and bid farewell to Lord Kane and Lady Aiko of the Eastern Lands.  
  
Outside the rain beat down hard on them, "Lady Rin we should find a place to stay for the night."  
  
"No, I think you should find somewhere for you and your mate. I will keep going I want to find Sesshoumaru."  
  
"But My Lady."  
  
Rin covered his mouth with her hand, "Thank you very much for your help, but I can make it on my own. All you need to do is go on and live a happy life with Kaiya and never caught up in this sort of situation again." she waved goodbye to the couple.  
  
Walking deeper and deeper into the forest was beginning to scare Rin. She had never wandered around without someone being there to protect her. [Oh Sesshoumaru where are you?]  
  
The rain had finally stopped; it still left Rin's kimono wet. Her dark blue kimono was soak through and had rips in it from the loose braches. When she reached a clearing, she noticed something across the way.  
  
* * *  
  
"My look what we have here." Kay cocked her head to one side.  
  
"Rin," Sesshoumaru words went unnoticed by the female youkai.  
  
"You know what you must do Sesshoumaru. If you do not stab her with this dagger then she will die by a real one." she handed him the small steel dagger. The demon lord saw his reflection in the blade, [Forgive me Rin.]  
  
He jumped into a nearby tree.  
  
* * *  
  
There was movement, the wind began to pick up, [Run!] was the only thought going through Rin's mind, [Run for your life.] She quickly turned on her heal and never looked back.  
  
Her chest was becoming tight and her breathing heavier. Feeling weak, Rin started to slow down, suddenly her body made contact with the earth. Someone was forcing her down. She would have screamed for her life; but her throat was too dry.  
  
Rin was whipped around only to come face to face with Sesshoumaru. His arms were on either side of her head, he was pinning her.  
  
Wetting her lips, Rin managed to speak, "Sesshoumaru" she raised her soiled handed to his face. "Oh, Sesshoumaru I thought I would never see you again. I was so scared." The young girl let her tears of relief rain heavily down her pale cheeks.  
  
Lord Sesshoumaru stayed silent.  
  
Rin brought her lips to his, but never made the connection. Sesshoumaru jerked away, "Rin don't." his silver hair made a curtain covering his face.  
  
"Sesshoumaru tell me what is wrong? Tell me what happened?" she made him make eye contact.  
  
The youkai's golden orbs swelled, "Run Rin, don't come back. Please I love you too much."  
  
"Run, Sesshoumaru what is going on? I don't want to run away from you."  
  
The wind swirled around them, "Sesshoumaru don't make me do this myself." Kay stood with one hand on her hip.  
  
The demon got off Rin and helped her up making her stand behind him, "You will not hurt Rin or me anymore, Kay."  
  
Her laugh was cold making a chill run down Rin's spine, "How do you plan on stopping me without the dagger?" The wind blew her waved black hair coving her face.  
  
Sesshoumaru felt his kimono, "Such a clever little wench." Sesshoumaru charged for Kay, but she disappeared before he even had a chance to release his poisons claws  
  
"Take once last look at Sesshoumaru, Rin for it will be your last seeing him as your husband, lover. mate"  
  
He turned just in time to see the dagger piercing Rin's heart. Rin's small form fell lifeless to the ground.  
  
Eyes now glowing red and green poison trickling from his claws, Sesshoumaru charged for Kay. "Die!" He caught her by the throat, "The last thing you will feel is pain, Kay; pain that you have caused." He tore through her body as if it was paper. His chest heaved up and down. The remains of Kay's body lay scattered on the earth.  
  
Sesshoumaru turned his attention back to Rin. The sun peeked through the clouds making the drops of rain diamonds in Rin's auburn hair. He knelt, "Rin.Rin?" Her body was so heavy, solid, in his arms, her skin translucent.  
  
Rin's black laced lashes fluttered open, "Sesshoumaru," she touched her wound staining her hand with blood, "I'm so cold."  
  
The rain started to fall again, turning the blood to a pinkish shade.  
  
"Shh.. It will be alright," he smoothed her hair away from her face, "you will be alright."  
  
She began to shiver, "I love you." her voice was a mere whisper.  
  
"Don't leave me Rin." she closed her hazel eyes, "I can't go on with out you." Sesshoumaru nuzzled his face into her soaked locks. His despair soon turned to anger, anger at the world that would soon take Rin's memories.  
  
He held on to Rin's body and jumped from tree to tree searching for the nearest village.  
  
* * *  
  
Sesshoumaru paced in front of the hut he had found. An elderly woman lived there who knew how to deal with daggers and such that was only used on Rin.  
  
The grey haired wrinkled woman approached Lord Sesshoumaru, "The girl will have trouble remembering you as her mate even though her heart was grazed by the enchanted dagger. Lady Rin will live."  
  
The demon lord let out a breath he did not know he was holding "Thank you."  
  
"However it is not this simple Lord Sesshoumaru of the Western Lands. You must teach her about your love. If you do not mate and mark her again by the next new moon she will be lost from you forever."  
  
He turned away, "That is only a week."  
  
"If you fail her heart will consumed by the poison; you will never be able to bring her back. Lady Rin will not remember you or your lives together further, more she will not be able to bear children. I am sorry that I cannot tell you better news."  
  
"Thank you. May I go see her now?"  
  
She bowed and lifted up the door for his tall form.  
  
Rin laid on the futon; broken, frail, nothing like the young girl who loved him. She was just a shell of her former self. Not having the will and strength, Sesshoumaru fell to his knees next to her. He did not want to touch her for fear; she would crumble with his touch. Her chest moved slowly with each breath; damaged, feeble that was what she was now. Not being able to stand just watching Rin, the demon lord picked Rin up and held her.  
  
[Emotionless, impassive, cold, arrogant, demon lord that is what I am, but now I am a damaged man. I had let the only woman in my life almost slip out of my hands. Rin is mine and soon she might not even know my existents.]  
  
The young girls' once cold skin was now being warm with her lover's tears. "Forgive me Rin, please." Sesshoumaru held her tighter. "Forgive me."  
  
* * *  
  
A/N: I know that I have taken along time with the chapter and I am sorry, but I am writing other stories. I hope everyone likes where this is going review and tell me what you think. Will Sesshoumaru be able to teach Rin in time? Oh and yes I know Sesshoumaru would never cry, but he may lose Rin ok so don't get mad me about that. 


	13. Shattered Memories

Day One..  
  
Rain beat heavily on the stone of their balcony as Sesshoumaru laid Rin down on the bed. He did not know if putting her in their room was a good idea, but the youkai needed to be near the human. Needed feel Rin's heart to show that she was real.  
  
Sesshoumaru wiped the raindrops from Rin's face, [I will never let you leave me Rin.] He climbed into bed with his mate pulling her body close to his.  
  
Hours later Rin awoke to find the warmth that had enclosed her had left. Pulling at the sheets to warm her freezing frame, Rin was entangled so bad that when she gave a great tug. A huge crash came when she landed on the hard wood floor. She looked at her surroundings, [I have been here before.] A light breeze came into the room; it brought a familiar smell to her elf- shaped nose. [Vanilla and freshness, I know that smell, but who is it from?] A vision of a man formed in her mind. Tall, amber eyes, hairs like ribbons of silver flowing around him, and he held what looked like a tail.  
  
The door flew open behind her, "What happened in here?" Sesshoumaru stared down at the young girl on the floor.  
  
"I was caught in the sheets, Sir, and I could not get out so I tried to pull myself free and."  
  
[Sir.] Sesshoumaru's heart sank.  
  
"I'm sorry Sir. I did not mean to disturb you."  
  
"Rin if you are fully rested now, perhaps you would enjoy having something to eat." Sesshoumaru walked over and helped Rin off the floor.  
  
"Thank you," she smiled with gratitude, though somewhat puzzled that he knew who she was, but she did not know him.  
  
As they walked down the hall, Rin thanked Lord Sesshoumaru for giving her a place to stay. It was then confirmed that Rin did not have a clue, who he was or that they were ever together. Sesshoumaru would now have to work hard if he wanted Rin's memories of him, of them, back for good.  
  
***********************************  
  
Rin sat kitty-corner from Lord Sesshoumaru. "Excuse me" she said, her voice was meek.  
  
The demon lord tried to make eye contact with Rin, but her auburn hair was covering her face.  
  
"I know that it is a bit late for introductions, but who are you?"  
  
"I am Lord Sesshoumaru of the Western Lands."  
  
Rin shook her head at the words, the same image of the man flashed in her mind. [Sesshoumaru? I know that name. I have said that name.] The smell came back to her, but this time so did a flash back.  
  
"Rin are you ok?" Sesshoumaru almost grabbed her hand, but stopped himself.  
  
[Sesshomaru's handsome face inches from hers lips coming closer, becoming embarrassed and feeling awkward she placed her head on his chest, his hands making circles on her lower back.] Rin could feel the warmth of his hands just by the thought.  
  
Shaking her head, Rin tried to focus on the images flashing through her.  
  
"Rin are you ok?" this time he touched her hand, but gently.  
  
The words "Trust me." echoed in Rin's mind as a flash of Sesshoumaru's naked body was on top of hers. She quickly pulled away from him. "Excuse me." Bolting towards the door Rin made it out to an elaborate garden where she did not stop. Rin had no idea where she was headed, but knowing that she could be around that man gave her enough reason not to look back.  
  
She finally came to the walls of the castle, [I have to find a way out I cannot stay here. Just looking at that man makes me.] Rin's chest constricted and her heart pounded.  
  
Making it around the castle's defenses, the rain started to fall again. Rin's white kimono was slick, sticking to her form, and was beginning to slow her down.  
  
She made it to a hill, where she saw gray, threatening skies meeting blue. Rin chased the blue the sky wanting to get out of the rain. Half way down the hill, the young girl's kimono had grass stains where it made contact with the earth. Severe pain rushing to her ankle, "Damn it." She tried to get up but made a poor attempt.  
  
"Let me help you." water droplets fell from Sesshoumaru's silvery-white mane, nose, and jaw.  
  
She gripped the slick grass trying to move away from the youkai, "Get away from me!"  
  
Getting down on one knee, the demon lord felt for any breaks in the bone. Rin yanked her ankle away, but Sesshoumaru's hold tightened making the girl yelp in pain.  
  
He felt again for any breaks, "The bone is not broken, but you will not be able to walk back please let me help you."  
  
"I don't need you!"  
  
A low growl rumbled from the demon's throat, "Do not defy me Rin."  
  
"How dare you speak to me as if I were yours. As if you owned me." without warning between Rin's shoulder and neck there was a pulse. She turned her head and closed her eyes, other flash back.  
  
[Sesshoumaru picked her up and placed her in front of a mirror. He took hold of the collar on her kimono and pulled it down, exposing her shoulder.  
  
"Do you see that mark?" he voice was cold.]  
  
Rin turned back and looked at Lord Sesshoumaru, again the girl protested by backing up, but was defeated. Feeling his arms go underneath her. Rin placed her arms around his neck only to get her hands tangled in his locks of silver. "Don't think that I am letting you help me."  
  
Sesshoumaru turned back to the direction of the castle, then felt Rin place her forehead on his broad shoulder.  
  
"Thank you," feeling childish and tired, Rin had given up. Closing her eyes, Rin saw something from before.  
  
[ Sesshoumaru stood in front her, "What are you doing out here?" Rin saw herself turn away, "Answer me!" The demon then threw her over his shoulder]. Memories from the past, Rin thought, but how did she know him?  
  
Sesshoumaru tried hard not the wake her as he went up the stairs and into their room. He laid Rin's soaked body on the bed, "Lord Sesshoumaru ."  
  
"Rin what is it?" he leaned close to her.  
  
"I'm sorry I ran away. I did not mean to scare you."  
  
He smoothed back her wet hair, "Rin, you did scare me by doing that. How could I live with out you?" he touched her cheek and started to lean closer, but stopped himself. "Goodnight Rin." Lord Sesshoumaru closed the door behind him.  
  
***********************************  
  
As the demon lord closed the door his little servant was strolling by, "Jaken, I am leaving. I need you to take care of Rin, but be careful with her she doesn't remember us or this place. I need you to make sure that she does not get herself into trouble do you understand?"  
  
"Yes, My Lord, I know that you want Lady Rin to remember this house and you."  
  
"Thank you, Jaken."  
  
"Of course My Lord; Lord Sesshoumaru may I ask where you are going?"  
  
"I am going back to the old woman who saved Rin to see if I can find out more."  
  
"Yes, My Lord."  
  
Sesshoumaru walked down the stairs and left, leaving Jaken to take care of the young girl. "I will help Rin regain her memory to please Lord Sesshoumaru.," the little toad thought to himself feeling very proud of the idea.  
  
*******************************  
  
[Oh, Lord Sesshoumaru how do we know each other? Why am I having these visions of you that only a wife would have? I have to find out more about this place.] Rin walked around the room.  
  
Across to the room there was a closet, Rin tiptoed over and opened the doors. There hung the most beautiful kimono she had ever laid eyes on; white with embroidered flowers, cherry blossoms to be exact, white and sliver beads tracing everything. She slid off her soaked and torn kimono and gingerly she took the other off the hook. Wrapping it around her small frame, she was surprised it fix like a glove. It complemented her very curve; it seemed as if the kimono was made just for her. She twirled in the gown as she danced about in it a wonderful smell hit her nose. It was the scent as that morning, fresh and vanilla. The young girl walked around trying to place it, but soon found it was her or more like the kimono that was giving off the aroma.  
  
[This morning before Lord Sesshoumaru walked in it smelled like that. Perhaps he is the one giving off the amazing smell, but why would the kimono have the same. Oh no, what if it was his wife's and now I am prancing around in it, but I have not seen a women around. Oh, goodness and what if she is dead!] Rin started to take off the robe when someone walked in.  
  
*********************************  
  
"I need to know more about Rin's condition."  
  
"Yes, My Lord what it is you would like to know?" the old woman smiled making her wrinkles deeper.  
  
"I need to know how I am to make her start remembering."  
  
"Well it cannot be forced on her. Lady Rin must learn everything for herself."  
  
"Forced?" he sipped his sake.  
  
"Yes, forced. Say that Lady Rin was told about her life before; it could hurt her memory making her forget everything. See Lady Rin does not have the memories with you because you are, or were her mate. However, the way that Lady Rin was hit she may have some of her memory of you and her. Though, if she was ever told about them then it would shatter what was left."  
  
"So, I am to re-teach Rin?"  
  
"Yes, but carefully. Sometimes the littlest things could set her back or take away everything."  
  
********************************  
  
"Oh good, Lady Rin, you are awake" a small toad looking creature approached her.  
  
"Have we met?"  
  
"I am Jaken, Lord Sesshoumaru's humble servant." he bowed on cue.  
  
"Oh how nice to meet you, Jaken."  
  
"Yes, Lord Sesshoumaru told me about your lost memory and I am here to help."  
  
"My lost memory?" Rin looked at him puzzled.  
  
"Follow me, Lady Rin, I will show you your room." he gave a wink, "Lets see if that will help." he then stepped out of the room.  
  
Rin did as she was asked.  
  
The room was just as beautiful as the rest of the house, "This was my room?" It looked bare.  
  
"This is where you lived until you and Lord Sesshoumaru well. you know." his smile soon became a puzzled look, "Well I guess you wouldn't, but that is why we are here." The toad kept walking around the room.  
  
"Wow this place is wonderful. Why don't I still live here Jaken?"  
  
"Because. I really don't know why. One day Lord Sesshoumaru had all of your stuff moved." he kept looking at the girl's old room.  
  
Suddenly an old memory hit Rin.  
  
["I have a request."  
  
"Oh really and what does that entail?"  
  
"You are to move into my bed chambers."]  
  
[In the flash back, I am bitter towards him, but why?] Rin thought.  
  
"How do Lord Sesshoumaru and I know each other?"  
  
"What," Jaken turned towards the girl now sitting on the canopy bed, "Oh you and Lord Sesshoumaru, well you two have known each other for 13 years."  
  
"We have? Then why don't I remember much of him? Wouldn't I remember the most if we new each other for so long?"  
  
"Yes, but you see.." Jaken stopped and looked around, listening for something, "Oh, Lady Rin, I must leave I believe the master is home."  
  
"Oh, okay, Jaken. It was nice talking to you."  
  
"You too, Lady Rin." he bowed and left Rin to her old forgotten room.  
  
She ran her fingers over the nightstand next to her bed, "Why don't I remember Lord Sesshoumaru?" Rin hung her head trying to think of a place of where they would have met or how she would have gotten there. Looking down at the hard wood floor, she noticed a sheet of paper that creases in three sections. "What's this, a note?" Picking it up she began to read:  
  
~Dear Rin.  
  
*******************************************  
  
"Oh Lord Sesshoumaru you are home, what did the old woman tell you anything good?" the toad stood with a stupid grin plastered on his face.  
  
"No, where is Rin?"  
  
"I am sorry to here that My Lord, Lady Rin is in her chambers I thought that if she were to be in familiar surroundings she would start to remember you."  
  
"What?" Sesshoumaru clenched his fists.  
  
"Don't worry My Lord, Rin is safe in her room."  
  
The demon jumped onto to banister and ran down the hallway to Rin.  
  
******************************************  
  
~Dear Rin,  
  
I know that you refuse to listen to me, but you need to know how I feel. I know you never want to see me again and I respect that.  
  
The day I told you to meet me in the garden I was going to tell you that I wanted you to be my mate. That I am in love with you, however I looked out my window from my study and saw you and that boy hugging and kissing. I thought you could not cause me pain, but you did. I did not know what to do, I knew at the time was you had picked someone else to make you happy. I never wanted Kay she was just there and when she was, I was thinking of you. The only reason I ever let her in was I thought I lost you to that youkai. I did not want to feel that pain anymore and granted that was a brainless way of dealing with it hope you can understand that.  
  
I will always regret doing that, but I know that I will never regret kissing you that day in the garden. I never thought I you would have me, however after that moment I knew I never wanted to let you go. When you asked me to stay the night with you, I do not regret that either. I did not sleep that night, all I could think about was you. Even though you ever right in front of me I did want to close my eyes and wake up to find it all to be a dream. Rin, I know that you will not believe me, but to know that you read this will make me just as happy as if I were to tell you. You were the one thing I ever wanted and I always loved you.  
  
Sesshoumaru  
  
P.S.  
  
I did not make love to Kay. ~  
  
Rin began to shake, "What in seven hells is going on? Were Sesshoumaru and I in love?"  
  
Suddenly her bedroom door flung open, Sesshoumaru walked over and grabbed the note out her hands. "Leave."  
  
"Why did you write that letter?"  
  
"What?" he looked down to see what she had read, "Dear Rin," [Damn it!]  
  
"What is going on?"  
  
"It's nothing you need to worry about just leave please."  
  
Rin stood her ground and did not dare even breathe.  
  
"I told you to get out, this is none of your concern and this," he crumbled up the letter, "you should forget about."  
  
"I need to know! I have these visions of us, of you and it is killing me! Who am I to you? How do we know each other?"  
  
"Rin please stop."  
  
"No, I need to know why I am seeing the things I see. I am having visions that only a lover would see of you, Sesshoumaru. I don't understand please just tell me. How do we know we each other?" she grabbed his hand.  
  
"It is not important right now."  
  
Anger took over Rin, "It's important to me!" she took the nearest object and hurled at a wall. "I have every right to know what is going on in my mind! You know and you will tell me! I need to know!" her heart pounded in her chest; "I need to know." she collapsed to the floor. She looked up at him tears streaming down her face. "Please Sesshoumaru tell me were we ever in love?"  
  
A/N: YAY!! I got an idea so now I will finish and no more saying that I will quit. I know you all hate it and I'm sorry, but sometimes I just think that you guys don't like it and that perhaps I should not waste my time. Thx again! Review! Review!! ^.^  
  
Many more chapters to come!! ^.^ 


	14. Taking Charge

Sesshoumaru started to leave the room, then stopped at the door, "Rin I cannot be the one to tell you about your past. If you wish to find out more you will have to relearn it." Suddenly the demon lord felt Rin lean her head on his back.  
  
"Please Lord Sesshoumaru," he turned to look at her, "tell me, what do I mean to you?"  
  
Sesshoumaru took a minute to think about what she asked and what she said, "Rin did you say you were having vision of me?"  
  
"Yes, but that is not the answer to my question."  
  
"When did you start having them? Was it after Jaken told you about your past and the letter?"  
  
"Answer my question first, were we ever in love?" her pleading voice was becoming bitter. [It is always about him!] She thought.  
  
The demon lord turned and took the girl by the shoulders, "This is more important, when did you start having these visions?"  
  
"Why should I tell you?"  
  
"Because I must know!" he shook her tiny body, "Our- my life depends on it."  
  
Rin tried to pull out of his grasp, "You only care if it affects your life! You don't give a damn about anyone else!"  
  
He let go of her, "I can't tell you!" his emotions were clouding his mind.  
  
The young girl stared at him, into those amber eyes and saw something, that perhaps he did need this information. [When he yelled his voice was full of sorrow; as if his happiness is hanging on by a tread.] She thought. "Please Sesshoumaru," she kept staring into him, "did I ever love you?" The youkai looked into her watery brown orbs; they captured him. Tearing his eyes away, he saw a tiny cut on Rin's bottom lip, where glass must have hit. He could smell the coppery liquid mixed with her scent. It took hold of the demon lord.  
  
Suddenly a clawed thumb smoothed Rin's bottom lip. She closed her eyes and leaned into his hand.  
  
Sesshoumaru wanted to pull Rin in and never let go, but he could not. He could not take her into his arms anytime he wanted, Rin would have to learn of their love. The demon regrettably pulled away, but was stopped as graceful fingers slid between his.  
  
"Will you teach me of my past Lord Sesshoumaru?"  
  
"Rin I .. I can't. I" He tried to pulled away again, but Rin gripped tighter.  
  
"Please," she whispered, "Please Sesshoumaru I can't do this without your help." She wrapped herself around him nuzzling into his torso, "I need you." Rin did not understand where her boldness was coming from, but she needed him.  
  
Visions of Rin flooded his mind, her smiling, her laughing, her calling his name, the words "I love you" falling from her lips. Lips.  
  
Wanting, needing, missing, her swallowed Sesshoumaru as he took hold of Rin's chin and slammed his moist lips onto hers. She let out a squeak being alarmed from the assault, but soon gave in. Rin worked her hands to the base of his neck and pulled him in closer, pressing his lips harder; it felt normal to do so.  
  
Suddenly Lord Sesshoumaru pulled away from the girl, "I can't do this, I can't do this to you, Rin," he let go, "I'm sorry." without letting her say a word of protest he left the room.  
  
"How could I let it get that far?" Sesshoumaru questioned himself.  
  
Rin sat down on the dusty bed in shock; she had just kissed a man she knew for only a few hours. However, Rin felt as if she had done it all before. That is was a natural thing for her to pull him in without a doubt. The girl now lay completely on her old bed. [This room was mine at one point in time, but why don't I remember it? Why do I only remember Lord Sesshoumaru? It is as if he was everything to me in my past. If it was, my past or perhaps it is still going on. Are Sesshoumaru and I still together?] Rin rolled over onto her side, "I don't understand," she declared aloud. Tears swelled, then fell the same time as her heart did. She was beginning to yearn for Sesshoumaru, but it had been only moments that they were apart. Rin moaned as if in pain, "Help, please help me Sesshoumaru." she covered face with her hands catching the salty tears.  
  
_________________________________________________________  
  
Sesshoumaru slid between the clean sheets feeling light as air on his skin. The bed huge that he lay in, room enough for two. [Rin] he thought as he moved his clawed hand back and forth where his precious Rin had slept. [Where is she going to sleep tonight? Will she sleep in her old chambers? I did not tell her that she lives in here.] He wondered this for a while then saw the door crack; making the hall light pour into the darken room hurting his eyes.  
  
A small figure broke the light; it moved around the room and now stood by the bed. It pulled back the sheets and got in, "Good night Lord Sesshoumaru," Rin's voice was too quite that he had to lean close to her. The girls' scent filled his nose, mind, and heart. Home, was the only word that came to mind. Sesshoumaru settled back down trying not to touch her for fear she would reject the idea of staying.  
  
___________________________________  
  
Day Two..  
  
Dawn broke the darkness, as Rin turned in her sleep. Soon the light made the girl aware of her surrounding. She lay next to a beautiful man, but not only next to, but right next to. Apparently, she had used his arm as a pillow that night and he had no abjection. For it seemed that he had not stirred once in the night from what Rin could see. [Has he not moved all night because of me?]  
  
Feeling overwhelmed with guilt, Rin started to leave the bed, but was stopped. Sesshoumaru's arm that hung on her midriff pulled tighter. Knowing that she would not be able to leave his grip, Rin turned. They now lay face to face. She began to study the creature that knew her past and perhaps played apart.  
  
At first, she only stared at him, but the temptation to touch was over whelming. She gingerly touched his forehead, brushing back his silver bangs to outlining the half moon, and then traced his jaw line, where she ended up at his soft lips. Rin lightly smoothed his bottom lip, which was indeed very soft to the touch. Laying there still tracing and admiring his face, the girl tried to remember his touches from yesterday.  
  
Lost in thought, Lady Rin was startled when the demon lord gave a deep sigh. Rin giggled feeling ridiculous from jumping.  
  
Sesshoumaru stretched and yawned, letting his grip on her go only for a few seconds. He no sooner took her into his arms once more and nuzzled into her. As the youkai lay there holding his fading mate, he felt a small vibration. The Lord perked up his ears and heard a female laugh. [My darling, Rin is laughing.] His heart skipped a few beats.  
  
Not being able to stop laughing, Rin tried to get away, not wanting to wake Lord Sesshoumaru.  
  
"What is so funny this early in the morning?" he looked up at Rins' glowing face.  
  
"Nothing," the girl felt the heat rise to her cheeks.  
  
"Nothing huh," cocking an eyebrow, Sesshoumaru started to tickle Rin sides.  
  
"Please" giggle, " Please Sess" laugh, "Sesshoumaru stop!" more laughing poured out of the girls' mouth.  
  
She pushed and twisted her away from him, but the girl was no match for him. With one finial shoved from Rin, Sesshoumaru pinned her, "Now tell me again what was so funny, Lady Rin?" he smirked.  
  
Rin held her lips tight showing that she was not giving up so easily.  
  
"Fine be that way," feeling tired from waking only moments ago, Sesshoumaru, without thinking laid on Rin, resting his head in the valley of her chest. The girls' heart began to pound at this and fear grew inside her. Sensing Rins' discomfort, the demon lord rolled off.  
  
Rin slipped off the bed and headed to the washroom, where she undressed to take a bath. As she waited in the water thoughts can pouring into her mind, [Why did I get stiff when he rested on me? If we were together then I should be comfortable with him.] Rin sank deeper, [I hope that he was someone in my past life. He is the most beautiful creature I have ever seen. I would be an idiot not have liked him.] Rin began to blush at his actions towards her.  
  
She giggled at her silly crush; "I love Sesshoumaru." the young girl went under the water kicking her legs at the realization. Lady Rin was falling for the demon lord.  
  
____________________________________  
  
Lord Sesshoumaru still laid in bed thinking about his actions, when a faint voice came from the bathroom. Curious, he got up and went to stand by the wall.  
  
"He is wonderful and strong and,"  
  
Sesshoumaru moved the door to look in.  
  
Rin hung over the side with her head resting on her arms, "and I'm falling for the selfish and arrogant man, who will never even think twice about me. He probably only thinks of me as a stupid young girl." she began to get out of the tub.  
  
Sesshoumaru started to turn back to their room, but stopped as he heard Rin continue with her train of thought.  
  
"What if I got the nerve to tell him." she sigh grabbing a towel to wrap herself in, "He would laugh in my face and pat my head saying how flatter he was, but he could never even see us together."  
  
Sesshoumaru was trying his best to listen but the site of Rin was mind- boggling.  
  
"But if we were lovers then he should be more than happy to hear that I love him, but what if we were not?" she questioned aloud. She then become conscious that she had no clothes with her in the washroom.  
  
The demon lord saw Rin start to move towards the door and walked back to the bed.  
  
"Lord Sesshoumaru?" the girl peeked out of the door way.  
  
"Hm?" he said acting nonchalantly.  
  
"I don't have a kimono to change into and I need one. Do you think that."  
  
"In the closet on the left." he said cutting her off.  
  
"I don't see it."  
  
"That is because it is out here." he smiled to himself.  
  
"Oh, well then don't look." [You jerk, who can't just hand me one.] Rin thought, gripping the towel tighter around her body. As she walked out, she saw the Sesshoumaru had listened and turned his back. Going to a door on the left, which she assumed, was a closet, her and Lord Sesshoumaru's clothing. As she chose a suitable red kimono, Rin smelled vanilla and freshness again. [It was him.] Her momentary hate melted as she beamed with joy as her silly crush deepened.  
  
Feeling that the demon lord would stay put, Rin dropped her towel and changed. However, Sesshoumaru had been staring the whole time, even before the dropping of the towel. He stood in awe at the site, feeling his own kimono tighten at the waist.  
  
"Rin," he said in a husky tone, watching Rin come closer. "We should go eat, you must be hungry."  
  
Seeing the site of his arousal, which she probably was not suppose to see, Rin wanted to play. "Starving actually." She stood only inches from him and could tell he was going mad. "Especially after you tickled torturer me." she grinned.  
  
Sesshoumaru could not take it, he grabbed Rin about he neck and kissed her with force. Enjoying the feeling on having Rin in his control, Sesshoumaru for once became bold and took the kiss further, by biting her bottom lip for access into her mouth and softy massaged her breast.  
  
As he did so, Lady Rin moaned.  
  
Holding onto his last string of sanity, Lord Sesshoumaru backed off, excused himself and went down stairs.  
  
"If he not going to tell me the truth about me; then I will have to get the information from Sesshoumaru myself." Rin declared and followed him down to the dinning room.  
  
A/N: Ok I know its had been forever, but I have been busy. Oh and sorry for leaving it there. I will keep going and don't worry I will update sooner than this time. Just incase anyone is confused, Rin is falling for Sesshoumaru again and will using her "ways" to get the information about her past from him. However, as she does so she is creating bigger problems for herself. Sorry for the recap, Thx and Review!  
  
Oh and we are now on day 2 out of the 7 that Sesshoumaru has to get Rin. 


	15. One Will Fade, One Will Die

Still Day Two..  
  
Sesshomaru strangely felt worried by her actions. He looked over at Rin across the table. [Why is she being so open to me? It is as if our relationship was never interrupted. As if Kay never existed. She doesn't know anything about what we learned to fight for, nothing about us.] Sesshoumaru let out a sigh remembering all of what they had gone through.  
  
"What is it Sesshoumaru?" he looked at her longingly, "Are you ok?"  
  
"Excuse me Rin I must leave. I have some pressing matters I must attend to." He bowed his head and left the room.  
  
Rin leaned back into the chair, "I need to talk to him, but now is he avoiding me." she said to herself aloud. [I thought we were getting closer with the kissing and groping scene up stairs and then with the tickling.] Heat rose to her cheeks remembering his touches. Not being one to give up Rin asked where the lord had run off to and went there to seek answers.  
  
Rin walked feverishly down the hall, but was stopped by a small toad like creature.  
  
"Oh! Rin I didn't see you there." he looked up with a stupid grin.  
  
"Jaken, how are you this afternoon?" she wanted to look for the demon lord, but thought better of it, because she realized her search was pointless. Rin had forgotten where he was.  
  
"Fine, now what are you doing, running down the hall in a huff?" Jaken even for himself was being very nice to Rin and he started to like her in her older age. [Maturity was a blessing,] he thought.  
  
"Well I was looking for Lord Sesshoumaru have you seen him?"  
  
"Oh yes, he was in his study last I saw of Lord Sesshoumaru was in his study; dealing with stupid humans who have damaged the Western Lands. Humans have to be the most idiotic creatures to walk this earth." he started to lead her to the study; when he realized his mistake.  
  
"Lady Rin, I am sorry I did not mean you of course. You are."  
  
The hurt girl cut off his silly excuses, "Jaken, tell me, does Lord Sesshoumaru share these feelings towards humans?" her heart was pounding loud enough to be heard.  
  
"Well yes, he is a demon. Demons tend not to care for humans and if there are a youkais, who does, they're few and far between." he walked further down the hall, "Here you go, please give the Lord my regards."  
  
"I will. Thank you."  
  
_____________________________  
  
The old woman sat poking at the fire and began to think about the dagger. Not being able get her mind off the silver blade, the woman went over and took out the knife. Swirls of color flashed in front of her and then came a premonition.  
  
["Sesshoumaru please don't leave me. I need you." Rin wrapped her arms around the youkai, "Sesshoumaru, I love you."  
  
His once vibrant amber eyes now were dull, without life. The dog demon's once bright and silvery ribbons that surrounded him were now a fading grey color. All the life in the demon lord, beautiful body and mind left.  
  
The young girl stared at the demon lord, "Sesshoumaru, come back, Sesshoumaru!" she pleaded with her deceased beloved.]  
  
The old woman dropped the dagger as if it had burned her, "He is dieing..."  
  
"Lord Sesshoumaru? Lady Satsuki is that who you are talking about?" the apprentice asked, the young girl had just starting learning from the old woman.  
  
"'One will fade and one will die, everyone feels the pain of love.'" she read from the markings on the dagger. "Lady Rin and Lord Sesshoumaru. He will die from a broken heart by the full moon just as she will forget him." She turned to her pupil, "Hurry, bring me my horse I must tell Lord Sesshoumaru of this news, hurry girl."  
  
______________________________  
  
Rin opened the study door and found the demon lord's back turned away from her. Letting out a sigh, the girl gathered her courage and approached him, but was startled when he spoke before she lay one foot down.  
  
"I will help you with your past, but you must promise me that you will do as I say." he turned way from the window, his hands behind his back. His body language was intimidating. "I will only do this if you truly want it. It is your past, not mine." He stood as a statue.  
  
However, his features told the truth. He looked vulnerable, as if it was his past as well. Rin smiled and reached for him, but he backed away.  
  
"I do want this Lord Sesshoumaru and I am grateful for your help." she hang her head, Rin knew why he did not want her to touch him. [Human, I am just a stupid human he liked to jerk around, but now he hates himself for touching me in the first place.]  
  
"Very well, now that is settled. Leave, I have many important things that I am required to finish." He sat back down and unrolled a parchment.  
  
Trying hard not to show that his rudeness had wounded her, Rin bit back the tears, "Thank you Lord Sesshoumaru for taking your precious time to help a human like me." She said, shutting the door.  
  
Sesshoumaru did not move he was in shock from her words, "'a human like me?' What did she mean by that?" The Demon Lord of the Western Lands wondered this and was in deep thought when the door opened.  
  
"Jaken!"  
  
The annoying toad demon opened the door, "Master, did you talk to Lady Rin?" Jaken tried to read Sesshoumarus' face.  
  
"Tell me Jaken, did you talk to Lady Rin?" Sesshoumaru saw the sweat slide down the toads' face and drip off his chin.  
  
_________________________  
  
Rin watched the cherry blossoms fall to the earth, "How could I have been so stupid? I should have known that he hated humans or at least just used them." The mentally slapped herself, "Maybe I don't want to know about my past." The young lady leaned back to lie in the grass but fell on something hard.  
  
"You should watch what you are doing before you do it."  
  
Rin looked up to see that she had fallen on Sesshoumarus' legs. Feeling the heat rise to her pale cheeks, Rin sat Indian-style, turned away from the great lord.  
  
"Is there something you wish of me Lord Sesshoumaru?"  
  
"Yes, there is. I believe you wanted to know about your past. So, I came to start on your lesson." He leaned in front of her, a silver lock brushed against her face. [Don't fall Rin, don't fall for him again.] She thought looking up to see his flawless face.  
  
"Well," he said offering her his clawed hand.  
  
"I don't want to do that right now, excuse me." she said standing without his help. Rin bowed and walked way, but she did not get very far. He grabbed her making her look at him.  
  
"Where do you think you are going? I told you we were to start the lesson and we will do so now." he gripped her arm tighter.  
  
Rin tired pulling away, but only got bruises in return where from his claws were digging into her.  
  
"I will not help you if you are to act like this," he said, in response she pulled, "Don't defy me, Rin."  
  
"Why, Sesshoumaru, Why are you so willing to help a human like me if you detest us so much?"  
  
"I only took a liking to one human," he let her go, "and that one was lost."  
  
Rin was about to laugh at his first comment, but held her tongue. "Who was it? Who was the human?"  
  
"She's gone," Sesshoumaru saw Rin tense from his sharp words. "Let's begin with your lesson."  
  
Rin stared at him noticing that he would not look at her, "Why are you avoiding my question?"  
  
The demon Lord's eyes flashed red from frustration, "Because it is none of your business and if I wanted you to know I would have told you!"  
  
The young girl had to know, what if it was she. "Did you love her?"  
  
"Stop," he panted, his chest was tightening he felt cold.  
  
"Did she make you happy?" [And was she a beautiful a youkai, who could make you laugh?] She thought while wanting to cry in pain.  
  
"Rin, stop," he took a deep breath.  
  
"Tell me Sesshoumaru, was it the same girl who wore the white kimono?" She gathered her courage for the next question, "Was it me? Was I the human? Is that why I saw you as a lover should?"  
  
The weakened youkai let himself fall against the trunk of the cherry blossom tree, "It's cold," he tried to swallow.  
  
Rin saw beads of sweat forming on Sesshoumaru's flawless brow, "Lord Sesshoumaru?" she knelt next to him. She moved back his pearly white bangs he was cold and clammy. "I going to get help." Rin started to stand, but was pulled into the demon's embrace.  
  
"Don't leave," he struggled to breathe, "Rin stay with me." Sesshoumaru squeezed her tightly as if she was the only thing left in his life, "Don't ever leave me."  
  
"I won't leave you, I promise. But you need help, I can't help you if you don't let me get someone to carry you back to the castle."  
  
He held her to his side, "Jaken and others will come, just stay here." Sesshoumaru pulled her closer leaving no gaps between their bodies and nuzzled the crook of her neck.  
  
_________________________________  
  
Lady Satsuki rode like the wind, "I hope I am not too late."  
  
Suddenly thunderous footsteps came from behind.  
  
[Just what I need thieves.] She rode harder, but was struck, the old woman laid on the ground. When she looked up her horse and bandits were gone. "Now I must was to Lord Sesshoumaru's castle. Please for heaven sake don't let me be there too late."  
  
Lady Satuki, stood and pressed onward. Even though she was wounded badly she knew she must get there.  
  
__________________________________  
  
Rin felt him taking deep breathes? Then suddenly, Sesshoumaru went limp; his arms were heavy on her waist. Looking up she saw his eyes were closed, "Sesshoumaru." He laid still. Rin tugged at his kimono, "Sesshoumaru." tears trickled down her ghostly white cheeks.  
  
She brought herself up onto her knees pulling harder on his clothes, "Sesshoumaru!"  
  
Day Three..  
  
=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*= A/N: Cliffy. are ya mad? 


	16. Goodbye is Not Enough

[I must make it to the castle. If not Sesshoumaru will, surely die of a broken heart and poor Rin will have to live without the memories of her mate.] Lady Satsuki thought, while practically choking in order to breathe as she ran.  
  
[If only Rin knew what to do if something happened to Lord Sesshoumaru. If only she knew that one simple, affectionate thing would help him just a little. That is the only thing that will save him. He must know that she is still bound to him in some way. Just a simple kiss would revive him for a few hours. A few hours, I need a few days. Just what I would need then I will be there to tell her if she wants the demon lord to live, she must mate with him, love him.] The old woman stopped in her tracks thinking of what would happen if she came too late. "His heart to go cold, so cold that it would stop and me knowing that only her touch can save him." She shook the thought away. "I mustn't think like that."  
  
=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=* Day Three..  
  
Rin dried herself off and dressed in a black kimono and looked into the mirror. She had not slept for hours and it was beginning to show. The young girl rubbed her eyes, making them even redder. Rin could not remember when she wasn't crying. It seemed like forever since she last saw her face a normal color.  
  
Stepping out into the dark bedroom, she saw the most beautiful youkai in all of the western lands. Rin walked over to the bed and grabbed the cold, clawed hand of the Great Demon Lord, Lord Sesshoumaru.  
  
=*=*=*=*=*=*=Flash Back=*=*=*=*=*=*  
  
"Sesshoumaru!" Rin rested her head on his muscular chest, "Stay with me. Please don't leave me alone." The broken girl's salt-water tears soaked his white kimono. "I don't want to be alone."  
  
"Master Sesshouamru! Lady Rin!" a shrill voice came into the garden. "Oh Lord Sesshoumaru, where are you?"  
  
Rin looked up the see the toad coming towards them, "Oh Jaken!" She wiped away her fresh tears.  
  
"Oh my, Lady Rin what happened? Lord Sesshouaru are you alright?" the dumb little servant stared at the fallen demon lord.  
  
"I think he is dying. I don't know what happened. We were talking then he said he was cold and then fell." Her word were choppy as she spoke.  
  
"Why didn't you call for help?" Jaken felt for sighs of life, "Why didn't you, Rin? We could have saved him!"  
  
Tears mercilessly fell down her cheeks, "He told me to stay. Sesshoumaru told me not to leave him," Rin look intently at the lifeless Sesshoumaru, "I promised him that I wouldn't leave his side." She laid in the lord's lap, "I am so sorry." Rin felt a great pain build in her chest.  
  
=*=*=*=*=*=End of Flash Back=*=*=*=*=*  
  
Rin climbed onto the bed next to Sesshoumaru, "Wake up, Sesshoumaru, please, please wake up," She gently nudged his cheek with a slender finger. Then moved his silvery bangs, [Oh Sesshoumaru why do you just lie there as if dead?] Rin wanted nothing more than to feel his lips though she knew that he was dying slowly. Gaining some courage Rin kissed his forehead.  
  
Sesshoumaru stirred and mumbled something inaudible.  
  
Rin turned away slipped off the cool sheets and went down stairs; missing his attempt to take hold her hand for comfort.  
  
She walked into the demon lord's study where she spied Jaken, trying to reach a book high on the shelf.  
  
"Jaken what are you doing in here?" she questioned sharply. Rin was beginning to hate the toad after what he said to her in the garden. He made her believe that Lord Sesshoumaru died and was she who caused it.  
  
"I was looking for Lord Sesshoumaru's condition."  
  
"What do you mean condition? You mean there are other cases like Sesshoumaru's?"  
  
"Perhaps I don't know really I was hoping that Master Sessshoumaru might have something in here."  
  
He pulled tighter on the book, which then caused all the books to fall on top of him.  
  
"Let me help you Jaken." Rin bent down and picked up books with odd symbols and languages on them. "Are you sure that these books will help?"  
  
"We can at least try, for Lord Sesshoumaru."  
  
"Yes we can," Rin chose a thick book with leather bindings and wooden covers, "Let's get started."  
  
They sat and read for two days not wanting to waste time. The duo would take shifts reading and watching to see if Lord Sesshoumaru had made any progress on his own.  
  
On the second night, Rin was in their bedroom, "Oh Sesshoumaru I wish you could see this moon." It was way past the first quarter of the moon waxing into the full.  
  
Rin stepped across the cold stone towards Sesshoumaru; some of the night's light fell on his face magnifying his features, which captured her adult thoughts.  
  
Slowly Rin climbed into the bed trying not to disturb him even though he had not moved a muscle, from what she saw. (A/N: Rin kissed his forehead that helped him, but she has not touched him since then. So he is back to dying. Keep going sorry to slow you down.)  
  
When she was completely under the covers, it felt colder under there then in the room. Sesshoumaru was causing it to be like that; he was becoming colder very day.  
  
Rin shifted her way over to him, wanting to be able to comfort him. However, she kept her distances with her body, but tried to reach him with her words. "Sesshoumaru, you can't leave." Her hand hovered above his face, "At least not until we have said our goodbyes, even though goodbye is not enough. But if we can't save you and if you have to leave me; I won't let you leave without knowing how I have felt these last few days."  
  
Sesshoumaru let out a deep sigh. Rin moved closer and propped herself on her elbow her other arm balancing on the other side. Leaning over him, Rin licked her dry lips. [This is horrible of me to do this to him, but.. but. I. love him.] Rin pressed her softened lips to his. Nothing happened at first just lips to lips, but then the girl felt Lord Sesshoumaru move his lips along hers.  
  
Keeping her eyes closed, Rin took in the sensation and loved it. Suddenly she felt his body awaken and clawed hands raked down her back. Rin stopped her lips to hear her kimono being tore off her body.  
  
"Sesshoumaru," she backed up to see golden eyes with flickers of scarlet staring into her. Rin's chocolate eyes widened, "Sesshoumaru," she whispered.  
  
"You didn't leave me," he saw tears form in her eyes, "Rin," he thumbed her cheek wiping the fresh tears.  
  
She hugged his torso and nuzzled his neck, "Of course I wouldn't leave you." Rin looked back into the fiery gaze. "Sesshoumaru, I need to tell you that I think that I'm" heat rushed to her cheeks, "I know that I'm."  
  
"Lady Rin!" a yell came from outside the door.  
  
"Lady Rin, someone is here to see you!"  
  
The girl sighed inwardly, "Coming Jaken!" she started to pull away.  
  
"Rin, wait," she turned to look at him; color was coming back to his pale face, "What were you going to say?" his voice was rough as if he need water.  
  
"It's nothing important I'll tell you when I come back" she walked back over to him, "But I did want to say this before I left, when I come back you must bathe because I caution your health. You have been here for a couple of days and I'm sure you would like to change."  
  
He grabbed her hand, "Thank you."  
  
Rin bowed and walked out of the room.  
  
"Now who is here Jaken?"  
  
"My Lady there is an old woman claiming to have helped Master Sesshoumaru."  
  
"What does she want from me?"  
  
Suddenly a wise sounding voice broke out from the stairs, "Lady Rin, I am Lady Satsuki and I know how to save your Lord."  
  
"Me?" fear started to grow in Rin. [What am I going to have to do?]  
  
"Yes child," She walked over to Rin and held her hand, "If you will let me, I will tell you how to save your love."  
  
She stumbled with her words, "My love?"  
  
"Yes you must save the Lord of the Western Lands."  
  
"What do I have to do?" Rin swallowed hard.  
  
"Let us sit and I will tell you everything you need to know."  
  
*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*  
  
A/N: Ok I hope you all like where this is going, oh and yes if you didn't catch that there will be more lime/lemony goodness to come. ^.^ Thx, and Review! 


	17. I Don't Know

Lady Satsuki sat across from the girl taking hold over her hands again, "Now Lady Rin it will be some what of a shock to hear this, but," the old women looked across the room at Jaken, "Will you excuse us?" she asked.  
  
He nodded and left even though he was dying to hear what would save his master. [That old woman had better know how to save Lord Sesshoumaru.]  
  
She smiled at the young girl as the door closed, "Well Lady Rin your mate,"  
  
"Rin please call me Rin, and I am not the lord's mate so..." She said as she pulled away from the old woman's hands.  
  
"Rin, if I may be so bold to ask, do you have feelings for the demon lord?"  
  
The girl shyly bowed her head to hide behind her auburn hair, "I am just a human..." [Just a human who is in love with a demon lord.] She thought.  
  
Lady Satsuki lifted Rin's head, "Humans need to be loved, just as demons do," her wrinkles deepened as she smiled, "He needs your love Rin. Lord Sesshoumaru loves you, but you must show him that he is wanted, that a cold hearted beast such as him can be loved."  
  
Worried tears formed in Rin's brown orbs, "He touches me as if I was always his, but his heart could be feeling differently. Lady Satsuki, you say that he loves me, but has he confided in you? Do you truly know that he has not turned against humans again?" she wiped her fallen tears away, "What if he doesn't love me?" A cry escaped her lips.  
  
"Oh child, I only tell you this because I can feel it, you must be the one to find out. I am only the messenger."  
  
"I don't know if I can do that." Rin stood wanting to leave; she could not take the wise woman's words. "I don't know if I can open my heart to Lord Sesshoumaru so straightforwardly." [What am I saying I was just about to confess my heart to him?] Rin inwardly sighed to herself.  
  
"If you have any feelings for him besides those of concern for his safety, go to Lord Sesshoumaru and let him know because if not Rin, I hate to tell you this, but he will die. His heart is freezing from the loss of your warmth. Lord Sesshoumaru needs you, Rin." Lady Satsuki stood and took hold of the girl's shoulders, "Tell him, tell him that you love him, save him."  
  
She pulled away, "Excuse me, Lady Satsuki." and went up stairs, but not to him. She could not just go running into his arms like before. It was too rushed.  
  
Rin walked up and down the hallway, [I never should have kissed him and now he will ask me about what I had to say. How can I tell him that I am in love with him and then show him my feelings? Lady Satsuki must not remember how it is to be a young girl.] Rin sat down on the floor in defeat, [How am I to show him I that I want him.] She became three shades darker thinking of how to answer that question. However, one question still loomed in the young girl's mind, [Does he feel the same or am I just a human, being used?] Rin thought remembering their kiss.  
  
=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*  
  
Hours later... (A/N: Sesshoumaru is dying yet again from the loss of touching Rin.)  
  
"Lord Sesshoumaru," Rin opened the door to see him still in the same position. "Lord Sesshoumaru, I came to help you with your bath."  
  
"Get out," he voice was icy. "I don't need one."  
  
"But my Lord I told you that I would help you." She picked up his arm and placed it around her tiny shoulders, "Just let me help you."  
  
He hissed as she pulled him up right, "I told you that I didn't need a bath and I don't need your assistants, human."  
  
The word human rang in Rin's ears. [I must show him. He really doesn't think this... I hope.] She shook her head trying to get out the horrible thought and turned her attention back to the demon lord.  
  
"Just let me help you." She spoke with a smile. [Lady Satsuki said that I would have to show him my love to save him, but how can I when he snaps at me?] Rin thought.  
  
Sesshoumaru pulled away from her trying to walk on his own and thankfully was caught in Rin's arms as he almost fell to the ground. The ill lord steadied himself by holding onto her waist, Rin started to pull back, but Sesshoumaru held her to him then let go.  
  
They walked into the washroom, "Now undress as I make sure the water is hot enough."  
  
The demon lord struggled out of his kimono, but managed to undress completely, "Now what am I to do?" he asked impassively.  
  
Rin turned to see a fully nude Sesshoumaru standing gracefully, his white mane glowed in the moon light coming from the high window behind him.  
  
"Well Sesshoumaru," he took note of her pale skin growing to a light pink, "the water is warm enough you should get in."  
  
"Yes I know that, but how am I to do that with you standing over there?"  
  
"Oh forgive me," Rin walked over and took hold of his naked shoulder and put her hand about his waist. She eased him into the bath, "Will you close your eyes as I change?" she asked walking over to another robe on a bench.  
  
"Why do you need to change?"  
  
"I do not wish to ruin this kimono."  
  
"But it already has tears in it, why do you care?" Rin had forgotten about the rips in her gown. Not caring about him looking, she turned around, Rin changed her black spoiled kimono, for a short, white, cotton, one to wash Sesshoumaru.  
  
As she modestly did this, the Lord of the Western Lands studied her as if she were a piece of artwork made just for him. The curve of her hips, her lean stomach, the around fullness of her breast, her swan like neck, her ivory skin, her, Rin was made just for him. He knew that he loved her, not just her body, but his heart burned to think of her like that without touching her lustrous skin.  
  
His heart beat fast, then faster when she turned letting him see her face glowing from the steam. Rin had such an innocent beauty; she was made for him and only him to gaze upon. "Who ruined your kimono?" he choked out in a husky voice, the look of her had gone straight to his head.  
  
"You," She picked up the soap and began to lather her hands. She moved around him, "Sit up," Rin lightly pushed her muscular back forward. Moving his silky hair to the side, Rin rubbed his back, working over his shoulder blazes and down his spine. She admired his form as the muscles worked under his off white skin showing that he was nothing, but muscle.  
  
"Thank you for helping me, Rin." he began to lightly growl at her actions, "And please forgive me for my coarse words earlier."  
  
"You're Welcome." She moved to the front to work on his chest.  
  
His eyes studied her as she scrubbed his shoulders and tight chest, "Do you forgive me?" She moved over his abdominal muscles, "Rin," he said, half-gasping and moaning, half questioning.  
  
Rin looked up, "Lean back so I can rinse the soap."  
  
He did as she asked.  
  
Grabbing a bottle of wonderful smelling vanilla, [So this is why Sesshoumaru always smelled like vanilla.] She thought as she sat behind him on a stool to wash his ribbons of silky white hair. His growl turned into a purr as she massaged his scalp, "Sit up, so I can rinse your hair, now." Again, he did as she asked and watched as she gathered water to clean him; back and forth, her hand came next to Sesshoumaru getting water.  
  
Suddenly Rin's wrist was grasped between Lord Sesshoumaru's clawed fingers, "Rin," he pulled her around to the side of the tub. He pulled her in with a loud slash, "Do you forgive me?"  
  
She moved her thick long hair away from her face, "What, for yelling at me or for pulling me into the bath."  
  
Sesshoumaru helped her clear her beautiful face of her soaked locks, "For yelling at you." He thumbed her cheek.  
  
"I'll forgive you if you will let me finish." Rin started to lift herself out of the tub, but was pushed back down and wrapped in strong arms.  
  
Sesshoumaru brought her back close to his chest "Rin, I will only let you finish," he kissed her neck, "if you will let me," he licked the junction between her shoulder and neck, "make love to you, Rin."  
  
"Sesshoumaru, I don't know if I can..." she licked her dry lips, as her mind became clouded.  
  
The demon lord turned the girl to face him, "I would not ask this of you if I did not feel for you."  
  
Rin bit her bottom lip, thinking of what to do and if she could do it. [Can I believe him or will he turn on me again.]  
  
He forced her eyes to meet his, "Love me Rin." He moved his mouth close to hers.  
  
Without thinking, without wanting to wonder why not, Rin captured Sesshoumaru's lips. Rin felt his hands cup her face, pulling her to his body, but she stopped before it could go any further. "I can't, I'm sorry."  
  
"What are you saying?"  
  
She was thankful that she was wet so he could not see her tears, "Can you really love a human?"  
  
"A human or you?"  
  
"Answer me." She pled not wanting him to change her thoughts.  
  
"I love you and you are a human, Rin. So yes I can love a human."  
  
She sighed considering his response, but was rudely disrupted as she was pulled out of the bath. Rin clung to Sesshoumaru feeling the air freeze her body.  
  
Setting the girl down, the demon lord, grabbed a towel wrapped it around Rin and rubbed the soft fabric along her body. Sesshoumaru was forced to stop in his motions, as Rin started to untie her damaged kimono.  
  
Sesshoumaru watched the soaked robe fall to the floor. He looked up from the garment seeing Rin. Her face showed nothing, but wanting. The youkai took the towel and placed it on her shoulders letting her take the edges to wrap herself. Although Rin thought better and let the towel drop, exposing her body and her heart to him.  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
"I don't know." Rin stood on her tiptoes and pulled Sesshoumaru into a bruising kiss.  
  
____________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________  
  
A/N: I updated!!! Anyways... yes there is a smut scene coming or is it? You know how I write one minute there hot and heavy the next the are both confused and heart broken... Review and tell me what you want to see next! Thx! ^.^ 


	18. Love Is More than Just A Word

Last time...  
  
Sesshoumaru watched the soaked robe fall to the floor. He looked up from the garment seeing Rin. Her face showed nothing, but wanting. The youkai took the towel and placed it on her shoulders letting her take the edges to wrap herself. Although Rin thought better and let the towel drop, exposing her body and her heart to him.  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
"I don't know." Rin stood on her tiptoes and pulled Sesshoumaru into a bruising kiss.  
  
New Chapter:  
  
"I don't know," Rin stood on her tiptoes and pulled Sesshoumaru into a bruising kiss. The demon, caught off guard when he felt her soft pouty lips capture his, was soon moaning. Rin slid her hands up and down Sesshoumaru's back, tracing every muscle. Mirroring his petite love (A/N: Rin), Sesshoumaru raked his claws down Rin's pale back, but went farther south and cupped Rin's backside.  
  
Gaining control, Sesshoumaru reached back and began to uncoil Rin's arms about his neck, "I thought you were going to finish my bath?" he questioned with a grin.  
  
"I thought you were going to make love to me..." Rin breathed onto his neck, as her arms encircled his waist.  
  
"Is that what you want Rin?" Sesshoumaru raised her head to meet his heated gaze. Rin bit her bottom lip and nodded silently. The youkai rested his forehead against the human girl, as he slipped his paw down her smooth stomach and cupped her fully. "You're wet...Rin." he said, half moaning at his mate's body's reaction towards him.  
  
"I need you...I need you to...love me." Rin was rocking her lower body against Sesshoumaru's hand, which kneed her aching flesh. "...Please!" Rin squeaked as a slender finger grazed her sensitive pearl. The young girl quickly grabbed onto the demon lord's shoulders to keep her balanced as he massaged her ache. Again, he touched and pushed her, making Rin bit hard on his shoulder to keep herself quiet.  
  
Soon Sesshoumaru's slow and agonizing touches became greater as he circled, rubbed, pushed her ruby pearl then slid a long slender finger inside to take away the tenderness in Rin's abdomen.  
  
"Sess... Sesshou...Sesshoumaru!" The demon lord felt her nails rake down his back as Rin fell into bliss.  
  
Panting Rin lay her damp forehead on his chest, "Take me into our bed." She was up in his arms as soon as the words left her mouth.  
  
The silver haired man placed Rin onto the sinking white bed, "Rin..." he whispered into her neck as he laid full length on her delicate body. The young girl could feel his tool of her release on her thigh and with this knowledge Rin's small hand soon encircled him. A short gasp escaped from Sesshoumaru's lips as his full throbbing erection was being held.  
  
"May I taste you?" Rin asked, as she licked the pulse in his neck.  
  
Sesshoumaru rolled over with the young girl's hand still holding him. Rin twisted her closed hand around his length gently, producing a low growl from her long forgotten mate. Sesshoumaru gently held her head as she rubbed the underside of her pink tongue hard across the top. Without thinking, the demon lord bucked his slender hips. "Rin...Rinnnn..." Not being able to withstand seeing his flawless face react, Rin enclosed his shaft with her pouty wet lips. Sesshouamru held the base of her ivory neck as she began a slow pace. "Please... please...Rin make me..." Sesshoumaru could not withstand the slow loving pain she was giving him.  
  
The young girl was now on her back, "Did I do something wrong?"  
  
"Yes." he nipped at her neck. "You were making me beg for my release." Sesshoumaru place his knee between Rin's milky white thighs.  
  
"Is that bad?" She arched into one of his hands as it kneed her breast.  
  
"For you..." he spread her legs and settled between them and slowly rubbed against her heated flesh. Moans and cries fell from her lips as he tongue made love to her.  
  
Sesshoumaru watched Rin roll her head back and forth, but soon grabbed her neck and pulling Rin into powerful kiss. With the slow mocking thrust, kisses, bites, touches, Rin need him. "Sesshoumaru... I ache...ah... I need you... inside..." she bit her lip, "I need you inside me." Rin suddenly let out a cry as she felt the tip of Sesshoumaru enter her, but quickly pulled out.  
  
Resting on his forearms, Sesshoumaru stopped his actions, "Rin?" he watched her soft breast rise and fall, it was so temping to lick her erect peaks. "Rin?"  
  
"Yes..." she answered, looking into his golden eyes.  
  
The Lord moved her brown locks, "Trust me." Sesshoumaru raised his lower half and brought it slamming into his Rin, just as his fangs bit hard into her shoulder.  
  
Rin felt his teeth pierce her delicate skin and at that moment the words Trust me echoed in her head as flashes of Sesshouamru and herself in the garden, kissing, hugging, fighting, crying, then finally making love. She arched as a cry escaped her rose lips, as everything returned...everything she lost.  
  
Sesshoumaru felt a light breeze tickle his broad shoulders; he looked at Rin. Her eyes danced as she stared into him. He held himself still within her, "What is the matter?"  
  
She cupped Sesshoumaru's face and looked at him as if seeing someone from a dream, "Sess...Sesshoumaru?" She asked, searching his eyes. She remembered this face. Rin traced the creased moon and the lines on his cheekbones, "Oh Sesshoumaru! I thought I would never see you again....when they took me away..." Her words were coming out choked from her sobs.  
  
[Back... she came back to me] the unbroken Sesshoumaru thought as he laid his head between her pale mounds, "My Rin." he breathed, as he now hovered over a pink taunt nipple and grasped it between his lips. His flicked his tongue across the sore flesh and looked up in those heavenly brown eyes, "You will never leave me again," he brought his hand behind her head and kissed her forcibly, "I promise you that, my love."  
  
"I love you, Sesshoumaru."  
  
Slowly the youkai moved his length deeper into the girl, "Rin..." Sesshoumaru sat up in a pushup position, "R...Rin." His mate arched into his movements. Holding his lower back, Rin met his thrust as he drove deeper and deeper into her. Soon the young girl was calling out for Sesshoumaru to go deeper, faster, and harder.  
  
"Sess... ah...Sesshoumaru...oh gods...Sessy...harder...please...Sesshoumaru" He pounded harder, harder, "Sesshoumaru!" Rin screamed to the top of her lungs.  
  
The demon lord licked Rin's love wound as his felt his length drain itself into his mate's waiting womb. "Rin," he stopped licking, "I love you." Sesshoumaru gently nipped her bottom lip and then pressed his fully against hers. Sesshoumaru wrapped his wife in his arms and rolled over to where Rin could rest upon his muscular chest.  
  
"Sesshoumaru?"  
  
He opened his golden orbs, "Hm?"  
  
Rin inched towards his face and whispered in his Elvin shape ear, "I will always love you." Kissing his cheek, the young girl lie back down and fell asleep in Sesshoumaru's arms.  
  
They lay like that until the wee morning wrapped in each other's arms knowing that this was just the beginning to their lives. Especially the demon lord knew this much, he could smell, that Rin was with child...children.  
  
A/N: This is the last chapter I think, I don't know if I really can or want to add more to the story. However, I have really enjoyed writing this story and I loved all of the reviews by the people who read it. Thank you so much and please tell me what you think!! . 


	19. Coming Soon

I am starting a new Sesshoumaru and Rin story... hopefully soon. I hope that you all will enjoy it as much as the first one I wrote. However I think this one will be set in modern times. I don't know yet. Oh, if you are reading this author's note and have not read chapter 18, you must read it because well it's the last chapter. Also, that it is a REAL chapter and not an author's note. Anyways... thx again for all of the reviews!!  
  
love ya advienne 


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